Nur Ein Wort

Cultural Differences

2007-07-05T19:40:00.000+02:00

My little sis is in town visiting and I am going to put a list of things we find different about Germany in comparison to the US. Since I am really used to being here, having her around has helped me see the differences I have just grown accustomed to. Some of these things will be elaborated on once the semester ends and I have some time to put some concluding thoughts down on paper.

Differences:
Change dishes at the cashier, so you don't have to hand your money over
Male purses
Escalators all over
The smell of sweat (though this may just be a big city thing)
Lots of bike riders
Doener... oh yeah
Hi-Top tennis shoes
Male capri pants
Cashiers sit down
Less seating at restaurants, lots of tables to just stand up and lean on and eat
Labor strikes, all the time (public transit, trains, newspapers printing, all in a year)
Very limited opening hours
Mohawks and mullets (sometimes together)
Customer service does not necessarily mean friendly service
Not lots of smiles between strangers (this may just be a big city thing)
Door handles and locks
Windows that open differently
No ice cubes in drinks
Carbonated water everywhere
Lack of AC
Beer
Different food--American brands are nasty tasting in Europe
Public displays of affection and public nudity (widely acceptable)
Hedgehogs and crazy little black squirrels
Public drinking (no open container laws)
Toilets (how they flush)
Cash (have to use it)
No drinking fountains
Few public restrooms
Mini-kegs (10 L of beer)

The Journey

2007-06-24T19:22:00.000+02:00

It has come to my attention recently that perhaps living in the present is much more important than living in the past or the future. I have realized that I have been living much too much in the future, putting off potential good times and experiences here in Europe for hopes and dreams that would take years to come to fruition in best case scenarios. I have always been incredibly goal oriented and future minded, as long as I can remember, but now I am finally realizing that is exactly the wrong philosophy one should have when having an experience like mine in Germany. You can't have one eye on the future, one eye on the past and nothing on the present. You have to be thinking about the present all the time, how best to enjoy the time you have. Lately I have been letting lots of things about the present pass me by.

That isn't to say that I haven't had a good time here, or haven't taken a lot away from this experience, I have. But, I do also have some regrets of things I could have done better if I had known better. I console myself by thinking that this reevaluation of my philosophy of living for the future is a great lesson that I have learned while being here, but at the same time that lesson would have been much better learned much earlier. It took some recent turns of events to realize just how ridiculously far I can take delayed gratification and living for the future.

I won't elaborate on those things, that is outside the scope of this blog, but instead will elaborate on what about being here has helped bring about that change as well. Every day is a learning experience here. Every time I step out of my room the probability I will get lost and have to adapt my plans is much greater than it ever would be in the US. Getting lost is part of studying abroad, and learning how to adapt to being lost and still take away something meaningful from being lost. Not being afraid to get lost once in awhile. Tonight, like so many other nights, I did something I never did back in the states--I took a walk in an area I didn't know at all, with no goal in mind, no purpose, just to walk around and enjoy the scenery. I got mildly lost, but followed the sunset in the right direction of my house and it was great to get back. The walk wasn't anything earth shattering, but it was good to get out, enjoy the scenery and not be obsessing about being somewhere at some specific time for some specific purpose--just relaxing, walking through a park, stopping to read once in awhile, or admire the stream. This is also a great metaphor for how I live my life, because I have never really stopped to enjoy the present very much--with achieving goals taking over my mind so much that every action I took felt as if it was geared toward achieving some higher objective. It had gotten to the point I couldn't just do things for the pleasure of doing them at the moment--if they had no lasting benefits they seemed like wasted time to me. This is of course a false assumption, a damaging one, one that kept me from taking some exploratory trips I would have liked to take around the area, from opening up to strangers more, from trying to actively meet people more.

The good news is that learning all of these things means I can work on adjusting myself while I am here for the remaining time and bring this new, more well-rounded world view back to school with me next year. (I realize the paradox I just created by looking at the future benefits of learning how to enjoy things for the moment... I'm still working on this whole enjoying the moment thing). Next year I am going to have to be able to take a pause from all of my work and stress and just cut loose with friends once in awhile or I will go crazy. I have to realize that sometimes you just need to have a good time. It is allowed, encouraged, a good idea even.

My little sister is soon visiting and I am sure she will help me greatly in implementing my new found philosophy, as well as giving me an excuse to undertake those trips that I put off earlier for all the wrong reasons. I am excited about this new opportunity, and about this realization and how it has helped me see I can do things better than I currently am, I can help myself be happier.

It's a cliche, but sometimes you have to sit back and enjoy the journey, not worrying about where it takes you, because you can never predict that.

Bamberg

2007-06-19T15:04:00.001+02:00

On a lazy Sunday afternoon we decided to take a three hour train ride to the quiet little town of Bamberg, Germany in northern Bavaria. Bamberg is interesting because it is small by German standards (around 60,000 people), and was relatively untouched during the war. It is also a UNESCO World Heritage site, and home to a relatively strange type of beer known as "Rauchbier" (literally "smoke beer"). The day was beautiful, the train ride relaxing, and we only spent a few hours in the town enjoying the sights and drinking the beer. It was great.

A view of the many spires rising through the sky.

A major Gothic era cathedral.

The river that runs through Bamberg is quite gross. It is also home to a shipping canal that connects the Danube, Rhein and Mainz, connecting the Black Sea with the Baltic.

This is the view from where we sat in the Beer Garden and spent the afternoon. Gorgeous.

Zum Wohl! (Toast!) Those are our Rauchbiere... they tasted delicious. They had a smoky aftertaste and did not taste like a typical German beer.

A fountain in Nuernburg that I photographed on our train layover. That is a skeleton strangling another skeleton on top of a giant Iguana with wings. It is quite bizarre.

I couldn't stop photographing this fountain.

Gluttony?

The river in Bamberg.

Bamberg reminded me a lot of a mini-Prague. I really enjoyed the paintings on the side of the buildings and the riverfront. It was definitely worth the 5 Euro train ticket. Bayern really can be beautiful if you bother to step outside of Munich once in awhile!

Pearl Jam Concert

2007-06-19T14:40:00.000+02:00

Photos from the Pearl Jam concert in Olympihalle Muenchen on 6/12/2007.

The show was great, but there is no way I have time to put down the hundreds or thousands of words it would take to express just how amazingly the band played. It was every bit as good as the concert in Prague, and probably a better experience--better seats, and a world premier of a new Pearl Jam song.

The set. Olympiahalle filling up.

Still relatively empty. Olympiahalle is quite huge.

Really huge...

The band in full swing.

The beginning of "Baba O'Riley" the Who cover the band played in tribute of the Who, who played the Olympiahalle the next night.

Eddie Vedder takes the mic during "Baba O'Riley".

The band says goodbye and goodnight after a 2 1/2 hour performance... we got our money's worth.

Munich Photos

2007-06-19T14:13:00.000+02:00

Kelly came to visit. We had a good time and here are some selected photos from that visit.

A penguin at the zoo who loved us.

A cool shot of a fish tank at the aquarium.

The chandelier at the Hard Rock Cafe. I'm officially an American tourist :-)

Me trying to read the video screen in the subway station.

A bum hanging out by the outdoor chess games. He noticed me taking a picture of these chess pieces and insisted I get him in the picture. Funny guy. In his hand you can see Munich's most popular beer--Augistiner Helles. It's pretty great.

The Hofgarten. If you've read the poem "The Wasteland" by T.S. Eliot this is what he was talking about. A beautiful place to spend a lazy Sunday afternoon.

The gate to "Konigsplatz". Hitler used this place as a rallying point for the Nazi party. The Allied Forces pretty much flattened it when they came to Munich.

The Greek Museum in Munich, if you look closely you can see a giant trojan horse in front of the building. Always cool.

Schloss Nymphenburg in the summer.

Ducks surfing on the fountain.

The gate to Dachau, one of the central concentration camps and the largest located within Germany proper. The words written on the gate "Arbeit macht Frei" translate into "Freedom through work" or "Work makes freedom". Of course, this, like so much in Nazi Germany was a lie.

All in all the visit was a good chance for me to get in touch with Munich and get some pictures of stuff I didn't already see. It was fun. Munich is a gorgeous city that I have started to get used to and ignore, which I shouldn't do... there is only a little time left here.

Updates and Photos and More

2007-06-19T00:05:00.000+02:00

In the next few days I will be posting a bunch of things from this semester that the craziness of this semester has prevented me from already posting. A preview:

Pictures-- from Bamberg, and around Munich
Essays-- A couple German essays I have written (fairly short, 500 words) that aren't half bad.
Thoughts
Projections
Updated feelings on Germany

Missing

2007-05-15T22:25:00.000+02:00

Today marks a strange day. I was sitting in my microeconomics class today, sweating a little realizing that the class is getting very difficult now, and the strangest feeling hit me. Germany feels like home. Maybe home is a stretch (there are no steaks and certain people I care deeply about are missing) but it feels like the norm now. For the first time since being over here having a class in German didn't feel slightly strange or frustrating, it was just the way it was. It was normal, a fact of life. What's more, I started thinking about how soon I am going to be back in the US (less than 90 days now) and it really hit me that this journey, experience or whatever word you want to give it is coming to an end, for good. That kind of wowed me.

I realized that it takes time to get used to a place. It took me awhile when I moved in high school, it took me awhile at college, and finally it took me awhile here in Germany, but I learned that I am truly adaptable. I adapted to a new country, a new language and a new culture enough to start feeling like it is normal. By no means have I suddenly mastered German, figured out the German way of life, and become able to explain the intricacies of Bavarian culture (no one can do that), but I can tell you what it feels like to really live in Germany. I can tell you the moods of Germany. I can tell you how Germans are as a nation (reading the newspaper has helped a bunch) and I can tell you what different priorities Germans have over Americans. I couldn't do that last semester, because I was still having trouble asking to buy my bus ticket.

This feeling has been building up lately, probably on the heels of a string of what I would call "intercultural communication successes". For example, I had to ask about registering for my final exam and had to visit various offices and talk to various different people in German to get everything set up to do that--and I did it, alone. Completely alone. I also went ahead and joined a debate club, and that has been one of the brightest spots in my semester so far. I have met German students in my microeconomics class and had conversations with them. I have had no problem telling the rude person on the subway to not push me. I have written several two to three page essays in German (still riddled with grammar failures, but comprehensible). I have found things I wanted to do, and been able to do them all on my own account. I watch German TV and read a German newspaper. I laugh at German comedies. I roll my eyes at German letters to the editor. I understand.... And all of these successes have added up and made me just feel like I can function here in Germany normally.

I still have a long way to go, and sometimes I feel lost, but those times are farther and farther apart. I am finding the right words. I am finding myself really comfortable here. I am finding friends. I am finding my own little German existence. It is exciting to feel like I have made that step finally.

Debating (2x)

2007-05-09T23:53:00.000+02:00

Since debating is something I know very well in the USA, having been an active participant for six years, I find the most cultural differences becoming clear to me during my participation in debate club activities. This also could be because it is the only place I am in a very small majority as a non-native German and the only place I am participating in what I would call a "normal" segment of German society. Debate club really is for people who just enjoy debate from across Munich, and there are dozens of people from all different walks of life who come (some often, some once in awhile), get together, and participate in an activity I know and love. Attending this club is the smartest thing I have done since coming to Germany--for sure.

Tonight I actually debated, but it isn't as brave as it sounds because tonight was a special evening where the club debated in English. At any rate there are a few things I can say anyway about the intricacies of the German debate style. The Germans use a style (roughly translated) I believe to be called "Public Parliamentary Debate". The interesting thing about this style is that there are three people per team as well as anywhere from 2-4 people who belong to neither team. After the first four speeches (two from each team) the 2-4 extra individuals are allowed to give shorter speeches for support of either side or against both. These individuals bring new arguments that both teams should respond to in each of their last speeches. This is an interesting idea, though it makes the debate harder to evaluate and much longer. It is fun in a non-competitive environment for sure. The strategic possibilities are also very interesting. (Short example: if all of the four "free speakers" chose to support one team, what effect would this have on that team's arguements... I should also mention this team that is "attacked" by the free speakers is allowed a one minute "defense" after the end of each speech, but the time stacks up (4 x 3.5 vs. 4 x1 = 14 v. 4 minutes of speaking time). Very interesting.

Germans debate much less structured and with much less theory than competitive collegiate debate in the US. This has advantages and disadvantages. Now I have always been against the super structure of US competitive debate and its inaccessibility to the general public (most people don't know what the terms Topicality, Kritik, Impact, Turn and Voter mean... and their lives aren't any worse off for that.). What is interesting is that I have now found that those same things I am against make the debate much easier to decide. When you want debate to be competitive you need to find the best possible mechanism to determine which team has argued better. This is not an easy task and some critics take a half hour to come to their decision after a good round (and then I believe a lot of them make their decision mostly off of a gut feeling they later try to justify using the above listed terms--not blaming them, these rounds can be practically impossible to decide). The benefit of all of this structure is it creates a framework in which different speaking styles, arguments types and general knowledge of one competitor can be compared against that of another.

This is exactly what happened in our debate tonight (or rather, didn't happen). There was absolutely no structure, which gives each following speaker no idea how to organize their speech. When there are no numbered points, no arguments with short names, no self-evaluation of arguments by one team (for example when a team says "and this third point is our strongest point") it makes it very difficult to "clash" or counter one team's arguments with those of another. The arguments are not exact, not well formed and very easily changed from speech to speech. When the arguments must be set within a structure they can't change into something they weren't intended for to avoid a good counter-argument. It isn't that debaters are always avoiding counter-arguments, but rather a natural human tendency when you are speaking in front of a group of people to take the easiest way out of a tough situation. The purpose of the structure is to make it harder to change your argument, by making each assumption and each conclusion very clear, than it is to counter your opponents argument. Maybe that isn't the purpose, perhaps it is only the effect it has, but either way... I prefer this system.

The structure also lends a lot of creativity to argument. Once you begin to look at competitive debate as a game and not as a life skill you begin to see the fun in the structured argument style. (I have my coach from last year, Thomas McCloskey to thank for opening my eyes on this matter). The ability to change the course of a round by introducing a completely new idea can be fun (though this ability can also be abused). The ability to talk about the power of rhetoric within a debate round and its impact on the real world is a great freedom and a great way for students to practice having arguments about things other than political things--for example arguments about the effects hateful violent words can have on individuals and whether we should be protected from these or not (for example if a debater uses a racial slur while making an argument the other team is allowed to argue against the use of this language, which changes the context of the round completely). Moreover, the rules are often decided and negotiated within the round, so if one team decides to let the other team do something quite strange outside of the framework and is unable to articulate a reason it should not be allowed, it is allowed. That the framework can be changed from round to round keeps the debate fresh, while also having the benefit of having some sort of pre-determined framework that debaters can work within in order to understand each other's arguments and counter each other's arguments more efficiently.

In regular arguments you wouldn't use debate terminology, but that doesn't mean you don't use similar skill sets, and the abilities you gain from debating within this framework won't transfer to a normal conversation outside of this framework. Quite the opposite, I think the framework (when it works and competitors use it in practice and really understand it) forces competitors to be much more precise in their argumentation which translates into the arguments they transform outside of this framework. Suddenly are their arguments in every day conversation more logically constructed and precise, because they have obtained the habit of reading different types of arguments, understanding the differences between them, and constructing and countering them very precisely.

Back to Germany. In German debate there are very few rules, there is very little structure, and there is not a lot of ability to introduce wacky arguments. Now I have only debated with one club and certainly haven't seen the top debaters in the country (although a pair by our club are very good and usually place quite well). I am excited to see how the entire "debate scene" in Germany is. It is certainly not as large as that in the US, not as competitive, not as young, and definitely not as stressful. Somehow, despite the confusion that comes from this very loosely structured style, I find it very enjoyable, with lots of benefits. It is less stressful, you don't feel afraid of making a tiny mistake that will undo an otherwise perfect arguments, you engage the audience and especially the general public (who come watch the debate club often) much more, and you feel a real connection with the audience. This is what debate's original intent is, to show the public through the exchange of opinions their options, and let them decide between the options and choose the best option. When it works it is a beautiful thing. That intent is still strong within the German debate system/structure/culture where in the US we have very clearly divided "competitive debate" and "traditional" or "everyday" debate. (Something my mother reminded me of often).

Anyway. Another Wednesday, another debate club, another good ending to the longest day of my week every week. I can't wait for next Wednesday, when, for the first time, I will attempt to debate in German! Yikes! (Luckily there is a lot of peer pressure because they Germans want a bit of revenge from tonight. I debated fairly well, because I had an obvious advantage (English as a native language). I think they want to see how I'll do outside of my native language and give me a taste of what they had to deal with tonight. I can't wait to rise to the challenge.)

One more thing, so I can remember. There is an award every evening for the "best speaker" of the evening. I want, one time, to be the best speaker in a German language debate that I take part in. If I can do this is another thing, but I am going to work on it.

Debating

2007-05-02T23:49:00.000+02:00

My first impression from the Munich debate club was that it was actually a club and not a student organization. A lot of the people were middle aged and most likely looking to improve their speaking skills for their job. That's fine, I'm cool with that, it was just different. The people were actually super nice, the nicest people I have met in Germany so far. They all talked to me, they welcomed me, they spoke with me in German, they asked me about the US--they were generally interested in me. We went over the rules of the debate style here (which is completely different than in the US) and then there was a debate. The debate was interesting, however the topic was a bit boring (should 16 year olds be allowed to vote). There weren't a lot of arguments put forth, but rather two arguments for each side which were very strongly supported--very different from a parliamentary debate in the US collegiate circuit. It was good for my German to follow the argumentation.

What surprised me the most was that I got up in front of thirty or so Germans, introduced myself, told them a little about myself, made a joke, and sat down---in German. This was a huge step for me. I didn't feel very uncomfortable, and I felt so good afterward. I felt like I was stepping back into my element--the element of addressing the public. I couldn't believe it. It felt like coming home instead of walking into a death trap (which speaking a foreign language often feels like).

I followed the debate this evening very well and afterward I met a bunch of really cool people. We went to a cafe and drank a few beers together, talked about politics, debating and the general state of the world--but all of it was in German. It was great. I met so many people, and they were all so nice, and actually interested in my perspective as an American--it was really cool. My mind is actually thinking in German now because I spoke so much German--and I keep wanting to type "wirklich" instead of really, because the German words keep coming to me. This is another big step I needed to really get a handle on the language.

This was the best decision I have made since coming to Germany. This was also the most fun I've had without Jeff and Katherine since being here (except of course when my girlfriend came to visit, but that is always assumed to be the best time!). I am really glad I have met real Germans, made new friends, and made some contact in Munich. It makes me feel more integrated and drawn into the culture. Seeing the debate topics, seeing the debate style, and seeing the speaking style of these people also makes me feel like I am a part of something, and that I am seeing some real cultural differences now.

After the debate club I had a long conversation with a very Bavarian, very nice guy who was about 25 years old. We talked about a lot of political things, we drank a couple of beers together, and we spoke in German. He was really supportive of me in learning German, and helped me with a few finer points of the language I always screw up. It was nice to speak with someone who's native language is German. It helped a lot, and I can look forward to it every Wednesday evening now.

All in all I am so glad I went to the debate club. It will really make my life a lot easier over here, giving me something I love to do, and it will help me in learning German. I am scheduled to debate at the meetings in the next two weeks (once in German and once in English) and I couldn't be more excited. It will really be a good chance for me to get my German on track, and meet lots of great people!

Fussballspiel

2007-04-29T17:47:00.000+02:00

I went to an FC Bayern soccer game this weekend. FC Bayern is one of the premiere teams in the top German national soccer league (Bundesliga 1). They have one of the most famous German soccer players of all time, goalie Oliver Kahn. They have a rabid fan base, lucrative sponsors, and are a bit like the New York Yankees in the "you either love them or hate them" sense. Living in Munich, I'm obliged to love them. They have an amazing arena, great players, and they are a lot of fun to watch. Plus they have a cool logo! Anyway, here are some pictures from the game.

That sweet arena. Allianz Arena is one of the most modern stadiums in the world and can hold up to 72,000 people.

This is the start of the game. We were pretty far away, but it didn't seem so far away--my camera just doesn't have much zoom. This is pretty much the view of the field from the worst seating category--and it wasn't that bad.

Look at this view of the stadium, and the back of some guy's head.

Another shot of the stadium during team warmups.

There is the goal, and in that goal is Oliver Kahn. He wore a baseball cap later in the game.

Sadly FC Bayern controlled the ball the whole game, but still lost after registering the first goal of the game in the first half. Kahn was beat by a long shot outside the goal box that he should have got his hands on, and then by a pretty nifty move by a striker who slipped behind the defense for the game winner. It was disappointing to see Bayern lose to Hamburg for only the 5th time ever at home, but that is how it was. The Hamburg fans were really rowdy and I got a great video of their section of the stadium going wild after a goal. They were much louder and more boisterous than the Munich fans, which was a bit disappointing.

Interestingly, the loss will keep Bayern from qualifying for the Champions League next year by ending all of their chances to get into the top three in the league. They needed to win out and have another team lose in order to have a chance. It must have been a disappointing end for them, but perhaps next season will go better with talk of revamping the team entirely.

The game was great. We talked to lots of Germans who asked us about the game as we walked back from the stadium decked out in new FC Bayern hats. Soccer is so much more popular in Germany than any single sport in America is--it is hard to explain. Soccer enjoys the same following, probably, of the three or four major US sports leagues (NBA, NFL, MLB and NHL). It is really crazy how universal soccer is followed here. It is kind of appealing, something that really binds the country. Kind of like the Super Bowl.

Semester Vergleich

2007-04-19T19:07:00.000+02:00

Last semester was hard. I am not going to lie. Academically, last semester was a joke, but it had to be. There was no other choice. My German wasn't good enough to take an academically rigorous class, and my familiarity with Munich was about none, so I couldn't explore very well other options available to me. I spent a lot of time trying to learn German, and the rest of the time not doing much. I wasn't productive and I got in a rut.

I am proud to say this semester that hasn't, and won't, happen. In the first week of the semester I have found a class to audit, four classes I enjoy that are rigorous enough to satisfy my academic hunger, joined a local debate club, and have found several new restaurants/student areas where there are postings about all of the local student activities. I haven't begun speaking to many students yet, but through the course of my classes I am sure that will become a necessity. I also have purchased television, which has been doing wonders for my German and subscribed to Germany's largest newspaper.

All of these things just are representative of the increased comfort level I feel with Germany now. Germany feels familiar, it doesn't feel like home, but it feels like a place I know, a place I understand. It took me a long, dark time to get there. But now that I'm here I feel like I can really make the most of my time here. That's a great feeling.

Anyway, just wanted to update about how much better this semester has been going than last semester. Off to do some microeconomics homework.

The Pendulum Swings Back

2007-04-19T10:21:00.000+02:00

This article scared me to death. Its a Times editorial from a professor at a school on the opposite coast from Virginia Tech calling for a rolling back of some students rights in order to "give professors more than a pencil to protect themselves." There are several problems with this thought--and putting aside th simple fact that most of those killed in Virginia Tech were students for a moment--and I found the article terrifying and offensive as a student.

The author claims evil is inherent in some individuals and as such sometimes there is nothing we can do to prevent their evil acts. I will agree with this, if only because I don't have the facts in front of me to dispute, but lets follow the logic. So, some students are inherently evil, and as such we need to have powers to prevent them from hurting others. The professor intentionally remains vague about just what powers we should give to University administrations to prevent these horrors, but one can imagine professors and administration officials with much more authority to remove "troublesome" students from the school. A stroke of a pen, a signature of confirmation from a Dean, and a student is dismissed because of "some inherent evil" the school can't prove, but can't take the risk on. After all, no school wants to be home to a tragedy such as what occurred at Virginia Tech.

American higher education institutions would do well to look very long and very hard before implementing any radical plans to lock down their schools, roll back student rights, and screen out potential "troublesome" students. Universities already are becoming less and less academically free in America today--although it is conservative thought that is oppressed at many universities--and letting one tragedy accelerate that process would be a mistake. We live in a large society, and an open society, and that openness comes with risks. Sometimes, despite all our best efforts a tragedy occurs (which I am sure is of little solace to the victims and their families at Virginia Tech--unfortunately there I can offer little). We must realize that no matter what we do tragedies like these will occur. It has been years since a shooting of this magnitude occurred on a college campus in the US and hopefully it will be years until the next, decades even. That doesn't mean that the millions of students who attend our higher education institutions between now and then should be treated like potential criminals, screened for unruly behavior, and stifled from pushing the limits and expressing their thoughts and ideas in new and sometimes radical ways. If you take those characteristics away from the college campus, if you treat the students like criminals, you will stop creating students who think on their own and start creating students who think like a collective, and who perhaps collectively believe no one around them is to be trusted, and any one could harbor some "inherent evil".

That would be the ultimate tragedy. Creating a society where trust, openness, and creative behavior are replaced with suspicion, doubt, and fear. I hope cooler heads prevail.

Back 2 School

2007-04-18T21:40:00.000+02:00

I am not the type of student who is easily frustrated by school, but since the beginning of this semester I am frustrated. I'm not frustrated with my classes (yet) and I'm not frustrated with having too much to do (that will come later as well I'm sure). I'm frustrated with the way classes are administrated, the way they are organized, and they way they take place. I will provide the following few examples to explain why I am very frustrated currently with my exchange program.

Example 1:

Our program offers us certain courses with very stringent attendance policies, and very fixed times. I am enrolled in three of these courses. We registered for these courses something like two weeks before the semester started. We met with the head of the program right before the semester to go over last minute changes--there were none. On the first day of class we find that one of our classes is incredibly overfilled, something a little counting could have revealed before the class started. The current solution is to split this class and another class into two, but that is proving quite difficult because all of the students have different schedules in outside courses they need to pursue at the LMU here in Munich. Those classes also have set times and days that they meet and are inflexible. However, our program expects to try to divide us after we've already decided on our schedules based on the assumption we had all the time outside of the classes we signed up for through them free. It is a nightmare, and now we are all left wondering for the next week or so where we will wind up and if we'll have to drop some of our courses on the LMU to take this course with our program.

Example 2:

One of our classes requires us to go seven times into the theater as a group with other students to see the plays we are reading in class performed. This is a wonderful opportunity to see theater and study it at the same time--and it is all included in the price of the program! Here is the problem--these theater visits are required and the dates for them are not set. Some of them will come on weekends or weeknights, but we don't know when many of them will take place. This means that planning for the rest of the semester on our part has to be very careful and very tenative because at any moment a theater evening could be planned that we are required to attend. This lack of forward planning is frustrating, especially in this semester when there are many holiday weekends in which it is easy to travel and see part of Europe in. I am, for example, trying to plan a trip to Florence, but am unsure whether our program is planning sending us to the Theater over one of the holiday weekends or not, and so as of yet, can't make any reservations/bookings.

Example 3:

There is a very specific way to register for classes with each of the different departments at the LMU here in Munich. Our program knows this method for maybe two of the dozens of departments. The LMU is chaotic and unless you know these specific ways to sign up for classes and learn about course offerings you are in for many surprises. For example, I showed up to what I thought was a class titled "Economic Sociology" only to find out the class had been changed during the semester break and was now a class on "Sociology of the Family" taught by the same professor. Not only this, but this class was only for 40 students and the first 40 to e-mail the professor received a place. This is apparently how all sociology classes work, and I was unaware of this. This happens regularly.

Our program offers us the following advice. To ask the department secretaries what we must do. This would be sound advice, except the secretaries assume we have some prior knowledge, and figuring anything out in a foreign language, as someone completely foreign to this University system is not only intimidating, but frustrating and incredibly fruitless most of the time.

Admittedly in the case of the sociology courses part of the blame lies with me--I picked my courses out too late to sign up properly for them at the sociology department. However, I was never told that any department signed students up for classes like this--and was working under the assumption that it was like the "normal" procedures of just showing up and signing your name on the list. Our program told us there were very few exceptions to this norm--I certainly didn't expect a whole department to be one of those. I was wrong.

Despite these frustrations, which I have learned not to attribute to the school here, but rather to the communication barrier and my programs relatively weak assistance in overcoming it, I have been having a good beginning of the semester. My courses seem interesting enough, its nice to be back in school, and there isn't the incredible shock of not understanding half of what is going on anymore. I understand at least 75% most of the time, unless the course heads into uncharted vocabulary territory--then it takes some dictionary work to get all caught up. That's what it is all about, and I'm excited to push my German further still.

Things should go well and I'll post updates about my class schedule and such soon!

Die Alpen

2007-04-17T19:41:00.000+02:00

Here are some pictures from the last thing we did before our freedom was taken from us and we were sent back to school. This hiking trip was a blast--we went to a mountain lake in the Alps called "Tegernsee". We took a BoB train there, a regional diesel train operating in Bavaria, and arrived in a beautiful mountain village. After a long day hiking we took a dip in the lake and headed back, exhausted, to get ready for class the next day.

This is what the Alps look like.

The path from whence we came. As you can see, its a long way down to that lake down there, which is where our train dropped us off in the morning.

The summit. Me, Katherine and Jeff.

These crosses are at the tops of many mountains in the Bavarian Alps.

After a long days hike, Jeff and I take the plunge into the iciest waters I have ever swam in. We didn't stay in long, but came out very refreshed!

Travels with Hermes

2007-04-16T23:31:00.000+02:00

It seems odd, reading a book titled "Travels with Charley: In Search of America" while studying abroad in Munich, Germany. I have to agree, but I can't help but realize that this book is the perfect companion to my studying abroad in Germany for several reasons. The most important reason is that since opening this book a few days ago many of the differences between here and America, and many of my reasons for going on this adventure are suddenly made very clear.

Driven under by the pressure of learning a new language, dealing with homesickness, and missing someone very particular very dearly was the reason I came to Europe in the first place. It was the need to go in order to come back. It was the need to understand by leaving. It was the need for context. Steinbeck depicts this perfectly in describing his choice to journey around America--he felt he had lost touch with the place he wrote so often about. I felt that I had never made contact with the wider world in which I existed. I felt that I had only ever understood my country from the context of within. I needed to experience the country from without, both in the physical sense, and in the sense of not having the country there to support me or aide me in many ways I now realize it does.

As if on cue this point was hammered home today when I flipped on the TV news after a long first day of class and saw America in the German news. The shooting at Virginia Tech is a profound tragedy, and I am sure it will deeply shake the nation for some time. For the first time I really experienced a world event from an outside perspective, and I couldn't help be touched at the thoroughness of the German coverage of this tragedy. The news station cleared all of its programming to provide up to the minute coverage of every detail of the tragedy. The newscasters seemed genuinely appalled, shocked, sympathetic, even hurt that such a terrible event could occur. Seemingly taking the high road instead of lamenting about the easy availability of guns in America and the culture of violence there German newscasters focused on the facts--how the police failed to respond to the first shooting, why the student committed this act. The opportunity to snub noses and feel superior was there as American society staggered from a very shocking event--and the German media showed a compassion that deeply touched me. For all of the conflicts across the Atlantic and all of the anti-American sentiment I have seen exhibited here I have always found that deep down there is compassion and enthusiasm for Americans and America still--despite our foreign policy. Europeans still very much retain the capacity to separate Americans from Washington D.C. and that fact very much comforts me.

This experience would not have happened had I not come to Munich. I never would have realized so clearly the difference foreign citizens, at least Europeans or Germans, make between the government of America and the people. I never would have realized that while they lovingly tease Americans, true anti-Americanism is rare. They lament McDonalds and some of our more terrible pop culture (you wouldn't be able to imagine what we export here), but they don't resent us.

Back to Steinbeck, who writes a grand novel, as ever. He travels alone to avoid coloring his experience with that of those with him and brings a dog for companionship. I don't have a dog, I have a stuffed turtle named Hermes. I am not alone--which I am thankful for--the few other Americans I really mesh with have been crucial in collectively figuring out how to live comfortably over here. But, I feel very much like an ambassador from Montana in the sense that I feel the urge to report and describe everything I see and tell my family and friends back home. I somehow want to bring this experience of being "without" the US back with me.

Forget learning the language (okay, not completely) and forget learning German history, the single most important thing to learn here is not about Germany, but about America, and myself. It is addition by subtraction, and a lot of other cliches all rolled up into one. But, there is a fundamental truth there. I understand America much better now, and I understand my own patriotism, my own sense of obligation and my own ideas about America much better than ever before. It is a strange irony that to truly understand something you have to leave it behind sometimes, and if and when you make it back you find you see it more clearly than you ever have before. Admittedly Steinbeck's trip is not of this nature--his trip is very much within America--but the reason for journeying is the same, the feelings of the trip are the same, and emotions associated with taking that trip are all there. When I read these words I got chills: "In long-range planning for a trip, I think there is a private conviction that it won't happen. As the day approached, my warm bed and my comfortable house grew increasingly desirable..." (Steinbeck, 19).

But, that is precisely why one must go. If for no other reason than to understand that comfort, to not lose sight of it--one must go. On return the air will taste sweeter, the bed will be much warmer, and the house more comfortable.

Learning German, studying Germany, and learning to live in a foreign country--as well as see all the beautiful sights--I am very appreciative of all of those things as well... for the record.

Wieder Anfangen

2007-04-16T22:46:00.000+02:00

Lots of things to cover. I just wanted to put a placeholder post here to remind others I am still alive, and remind myself to write about a few topics for later:

1) The new semester

2) Spring break

3) My current feelings on studying abroad

4) My adventure in the Alps

Check back later!

End of Semester

2007-02-09T16:13:00.000+01:00

I should apologize for writing absolutely nothing in January. January was crazy. January was when the semester wrapped up, and when I was running around trying to figure a lot of things out. If I have anyone left reading this--that's the apology.

On to what is going on! I just finished my semester. It's all over. I had, in the end, three final exams, an oral report and a 4,500 word essay (in German!). I think I did well on all of them and expect to be getting really good grades this semester. It took a lot of energy to get all of that done, but now I can look back at it and be really proud--mostly about the paper which was one of the more difficult things I've had to write.

I look back at where I am in my German now and where I was when I started and it is quite amazing. I have learned so much German here and I feel like I am making the kind of progress I couldn't have made without this kind of immersion. Lots of the nagging problems I was having over here (i.e. inability to speak to anyone!), and the things that were making me uncomfortable, are no longer bothering me and I feel like the next semester is going to be my "reward" for surviving the first semester.

My paper was definitely something I never would have been able to write before. It is an essay concerning the use of different narrative perspectives to support the three major themes in the novel "Der Vorleser" by Bernhard Schlink (The Reader in English, it was translated and an Oprah's Book Club book apparently). I'm not completely happy with it, my argument was strained at times and I didn't always completely support my thesis, but in the end I made a good case for why Schlink chose the narrator type he did, and I did it in 4,800 German words. I used some pretty advanced grammatical concepts including Nebensaetze, Genitiv, Passiv and Konjunktiv II. It was nice to see how naturally some of those grammatical structures came to me to use, and while my first draft was still riddled with grammatical errors, I believe that I am definitely getting a much better feel for the language.

When I am feeling like I haven't learned enough German I just remind myself this is only my 3rd year of German.

I also read several books this semester in German. I read seven novels (most of them under 200 pages, but still) and two pieces of books handling the immigration situation in Germany (both around 100 pages) as well as some miscellaneous political theory readings. My reading comprehension is getting better all the time, and I believe it is the part of my German that is developing the fastest. I am planning on reading at least two more German books over my break in the next nine weeks and then diving right back in next semester with my studies.

I promise to update more, but I just thought I would mark the end of the semester with a quick look at how I'm feeling about my progress in German studies. I'm feeling very good about it.

But, I'm so glad the semester is over. I am exhausted and ready for a break from classes, some time to just relax, some time to travel, some time to sleep, and some time to think. Even though my semester was not very stressful with weekly work, somehow just having homework hanging over my head hindered my ability to really relax. Even if I felt completely prepared for a test, I would study more and over study, not being able to just relax. I am really looking forward now to just relaxing.

Demand over Supply

2006-12-16T01:52:00.000+01:00

Since my neighbor is bent on making it impossible for me to sleep, and not by doing anything interesting but rather by playing terrible techno music so loud it shakes my walls, I laid awake and had the following smattering of thought:

Society is increasingly being organized around the idea of the individual as a customer. I am not the first person to observe this fact. Countries are competing for citizens (brain drain effects), companies compete much harder for buyers, organizations compete for members, men and women compete much more strongly for spouses because human being have become increasingly more mobile and less bonded by social pressures and groups. The demands of the people are increasingly dictating what is supplied.

Cynics, of which I know many and sometimes am, often say that actually the suppliers tell us what we will demand--through advertisements, media control, and social elites. I don't know how much I buy this argument, though surely this factor plays a role. I think those of us in Western capitalistic democracies are now enjoying an unprecedented amount of choice and individual freedom. Surely in some areas our freedoms are much more advanced than others, but the march toward much more individual autonomy is well underway.

The question is, where do we stop? When will we have assured enough autonomy without destroying social bonds and meaningful ties. Much philosophy surrounds this question, a question that often haunts me, a question I find infecting decisions in my life all the time.

I think somehow the question is deeply tied to the amount of information we as human beings can process. Rational choices are based on the assumption of the processing of all the pertinent information--something we do not always have. Deborah Stone covers this very well in her book "Policy Paradox." But, what Stone doesn't pursue, at least in this book, is the idea that our inability to have all the information, and our inability to process all of the pertinent decision for complex decisions (which due to globalization and liquidity within our world there are increasingly more of, every decision is seemingly more complicated) may in fact be a limiting factor here. I believe resistance to this information overload is a very real response to the possibilities opened up by the Information Age.

This is a question I will have to think much more deeply on, and think I will, that is for sure. I do not believe ever increasing amounts of information and options is the answer to a way to organize our society. At some point the benefits begin to fade and society begins to fragment, and one has to wonder within what system do those freedoms even exist anymore?

I realize I am echoing communitarian thought. But there is more to it than that. Communitarianism is not so much the answer as it is the logical counterpoint to individual liberalism. The true answer lies somewhere in the muddled middle--a balance Rawls tried, and perhaps succeeded, to strike. But the implementation and proliferation of this idea throughout our society is the next step, and how that process plays out could either make for a boring century (if it gradually leads to society surrendering some choices and options for the good of the whole, or processing information more quickly to allow the choices to fragment society less) or an exciting century (mass countermovements, protests against the fragmenting of society, deep political divides).

It's something to think very much about. So I thank my neighbor and their wonderful techno music for this sleepless evening to ponder.

Am I Really a Space Man?

2006-12-10T23:37:00.000+01:00

I am very much looking to heading home for Christmas to see and understand how being in this environment here in Germany has changed the way I see things and the way I feel about things. I have a few suspicions:

1) I have greatly underestimated the importance, impact and necessity of family in my life--a lie I have been telling myself since coming to college and used to motivate myself. That lie has slowly been eroding as my relationship with every member of my family has grown so much stronger that they are now essential parts of my life in a way that I never thought would be possible. Something the complete absence of my family in my life over here has made abundantly clear.

2) I have tried to conceal and deny the importance of growing up in a rural area, often feeling ashamed (wrongfully so) of the rural lifestyle. Having lived in a city for four months now I feel I much better understand the aspects of living in a rural area that have shaped who I am, and those parts that have not. And I like talking about my rural lifestyle with Germans here, they often find it really interesting, and sometimes envious.

3) Love. I've taken it for granted the past few years--the love I have and receive from my family, friends, and Kelly. Being far away from all of them, feeling the absence of that kind of love because of the temporariness of everything here, and the short time I've known everyone here, has made me realize that the people I care about, and who care about me, are a much bigger part of my life and my happiness than I had thought.

4) More patriotic. I like Germany a lot, don't get me wrong, but my heart will always be American, as cheesy as that sounds. I'm ashamed of the things America does wrong, not because I think America is a bad country, but because I think America is a great country and I hold it to higher standards. Sometimes I think the unfortunate side effect of being a superpower is while the accomplishments are greater, so are the mistakes. Great power = great responsibility and all of that.

5) Broadened horizons. This one's obvious. The rest of the world seems very much more accessible to me now--even as a rural kid. I'm very excited to bring that world back to my Grandparents and family and show them where our family came from as well, show them our roots. At the very least, it's interesting.

Ohne Hausaufgaben

2006-12-10T20:10:00.000+01:00

09.12.2006
Heute war langweilig am Beginn. Keine Hausaufgaben. Ich las "Faserland" und fand es schlecht. Es handelt von ein böse Mann, und ich dachte es gibt kein Grund warum ich für ihn Leid fühlen soll. Es gab viele Schimpfwörter und ich fand den Wortschatz sehr interessant. Was besonders gut war, ich verstand das Buch am meistens sehr gut. Die Thema war leider so langweilig.

Ich telefonierte mit meiner Tante, die vor ein paar Tagen eine Operation hätte, meine Schwester, Meine Mutti und meine Großeltern auch.

Aber spät am Abends war total Spass. Alex und ich schauten zwei Films ins Englischkino an (ein Double Feature). Wir sahen "The Departed" und "Casino Royale," die beide war ziemlich gut. Meine Freundin empfiehlt "The Departed" und sagte es war am besten dieses Jahr vielleicht. Ich glaube sie hat Recht. Es ist ganz normal dass sie Recht hat--ich soll das bisher schon wissen.

Wir lassen das Kino um 4 Uhr also wir müssen ein Taxi nach Hause nehmen. Das war OK, Taxi fahren ist ganz anders als U-Bahn und gefällt mir. Man kann die Stadt viel besser sehen wenn man nicht in ein Tunnel fährt. Leider ist es wirklich teuer.

Ins Bett um 5 Uhr nach wirklich viel Spaß.

Nochmal

2006-12-08T20:05:00.000+01:00

08.12.2006
Heute, Interviews nochmal. Das Interview heute war auch gut. Ich dachte vielleicht es wird ein "Letdown" sein, aber es war auch wirklich toll. Der Schulleiter war auch nett und er gab uns ein "Schulbericht" oder "Jahresbuch" von der Schule. Die Schule und die Bücher waren toll, und wirklich interessant. Er war Schulleiter bei ein Gymnasium im Schwabing. Die Schule war gross (am grössten im München) und sehr interessant.

Dann habe ich wirklich zu viel geschlafen von 12 bis 16 Uhr, und ich habe keine Ahnung warum.

Leider streitet jemand in meine Haus mit mir über etwas ich nicht verstehen könne. Er spricht bulgarisch und fast kein Deutsch, und ich sprach niemals vor mit ihm. Ich denke er war ein bisschen betrunken und so er streitet mit mir weil ich da in diesen Moment war. Kein Problem, ich sagte "Entschuldigung" ein paar mal und wir waren quitt. Ich denke. Es war ein wirklich komisch Abend, sicherlich.

Interview

2006-12-07T19:58:00.000+01:00

07.12.2006
Heute haben Jeffrey und ich ein Interview mit einem Schulleiter gemacht. Es war total Spass und er war wirklich nett. Die Schule--Willy-Brand Gesamtschule--war wirklich toll. Sie ist sehr progressive und wir lernten viele über Schulreform und verschiedene Schultypen im Deutschland. Ich fand so viele Dinge besonders interessant, aber am interessanten war dieses "Beamtensoldungssystem" wie ein Lehrerrankingsytem. Die Lehrkraft bekommen eine Note und das bedeutet sie können verschiedene Arbeitniveaus haben. Z.B. nur ein A15-19 Lehrer kann im Gymnasium lehren. Wir haben gar nichts wie das in den USA.

Das Interview läuft gut und wir waren sehr professionell und alles war gut bei unser Deutsch.

Später kochten Jeff und ich Tintenfisch mit Sonnenblumenöl und Pommes fritas auch. Es schmeck wirklich gut, aber wir arbeiteten fuer 1 1/2 Stunden. Das ist wirklich zu lang.

Auch interessant ist ich finde Deutsch zu lesen einfacher und einfacher. Ich muss nicht so viele Wörter nachschlagen und ich genieße die Geschichten wir lesen müssen. Es geht noch langsam aber es ist nicht so langsam, und ich denke ich kann viele deutsche Romans lesen. Also, werde ich ein paar mehr kaufen ich glabue. Deutsche Filme auch, natürlich.

Nürnberg

2006-12-02T22:18:00.000+01:00

Some photos from our trip to the historic city of Nuremberg. It was quite a lot of fun!

Katherine and me toasting to something or other (perhaps surviving the craziest shopping crowd I've ever seen at the Christmas Markets in Nuremberg which attract over 2 million people every December... double the side of Oktoberfest). Those glasses are shaped like little boots and filled with a spicy, warm drink called "Gluehwein" which is like really sweet red wine that is warm. It was terribly cold so I think the places selling that stuff probably made a killing.

This is the great Congress Hall (or the remains of it) that Hitler attempted to build in Nuremberg in an attempt to make the city an important central rallying city for the Nazi party. The Nazi rally grounds were here in Nuremberg as well, where the party celebrated its existence and success most of the years it was in existence.

The old city wall. This wall is almost 1000 years old and contributed the fact that until 1945 when the Allies came storming into Germany the city of Nuremberg had never once been conquered by an invading army. The wall actually goes all the way around the "inner-city" and is completely intact to this day.

You can see some of the Christmas Markets chilling out on this bridge over the river that runs through Nuremberg.

This is a famous building in Nuremberg, but our tour was really hard to understand/hear because it was crowded and cold. All I know is that people with the plague would stay in that building and the church would take care of them. For a long time they just threw the bodies into the water until a clever person working there realized that this contributed to the spread of the disease. The things Europe has suffered through amaze me--what a brutal time to live the Middle Ages must have been.

Thanksgiving Photos

2006-12-01T17:20:00.000+01:00

Thanksgiving was good.

Always take a big bite / It's such a gorgeous sight/ To see you eat in the middle of the night--especially if it is a delicious Döner Kebab.

Theatinerkirche, simple and beautiful.

A sitting room in Schloss Nymphenburg.

A chandelier in Schloss Nymphenburg, yeah, they had a ton of these things.

Frauenkirche looms in the background. That's a pretty cool looking Munich street in the foreground.

Schweig!

2006-12-01T17:04:00.000+01:00

I know I haven't written much lately. November seemed set to be a record setting month for the blog with many more posts than previous months, but sometimes life gets in the way. I haven't been sleeping much lately and I'm not sure why. It's been tough to find the energy to sit down and write my thoughts out. I think I am just emotionally drained because of the buildup for Thanksgiving and then the absence that it left. I'm sure I'll bounce back, but I'm readjusting I guess.

Things aren't bad, I've had some good days lately, talking to lots of different people, being social, studying hard and doing well on my exams. My German seems to be improving still, and I feel much more comfortable using it--and was quite proud of how well it served me over Thanksgiving, with only one minor mix-up concerning ordering partridge at dinner for my girlfriend after thinking it was simply fancy chicken.

I will throw up some pictures from Thanksgiving relatively soon as we did some good sightseeing and it is fun to show off some of the amazing sights in Munich.

Three more weeks of class then it is back to the USA for some warm food, cold weather, and quality time with the people I love. Until then it's learning more German, and navigating myself through a few big assignments until then (a series of interviews with principles of the different German school types, should be fun).

Bis dann!

Two Snowflakes

2006-11-26T18:09:00.000+01:00

I've lost you and I feel myself melting... again.

Signs I'm the Luckiest Person Alive (Pt. 1)

2006-11-22T10:31:00.000+01:00

Kelly comes today. I go to class this morning where I will have to wait five agonizing hours before leaving to pick her up at the airport (not to mention get homework piled upon me that I'll have to try to do in the few hours this weekend Kelly isn't here) and a miracle happens. The director of our program tells us our professor is sick and there will be no class today.

Coincidence? Probably. But part of me is deeply suspicious she skipped class today because of me. That's a bit egocentric, but she was pretty excited my girlfriend was visiting too, and felt pretty badly for me that we were going to have three tests on Monday and I would have no time to study. Maybe she felt kind of sick, and it was enough to justify not having class if she didn't feel up to it, and maybe I tipped the scales.

Probably not, probably just a coincidence, but I don't really care why it happened, it just means my weekend is going to be that much better. No stress. Just a nice relaxing few days with Kelly. It couldn't have worked out more perfectly!

Political Classes

2006-11-21T18:40:00.000+01:00

Today I was more than a little frustrated with my class at the LMU. I think I am experiencing university culture shock because I am increasingly frustrated with the way class goes every week. This week, once again, we completely ignored the syllabus and reviewed a bunch of things we already learned, repeated a debate we already had in class, and in the last twenty minutes got to new material that had merit--but this material was presented by another student in the class and not the professor.

I spoke with another student in the class a couple weeks ago and she told me her experience with German university courses was that they are often much less organized than other universities she had attended (namely in Poland). She told me it was often frustrating to her how the professor would just begin class by talking about whatever they felt like and disregarding the course plan--and that professors were often very unorganized. She also noted our professor seemed to be particularly unorganized--and I agreed.

That isn't too frustrating to me because I firmly believe any learning is beneficial--even if it is inefficient to have a course be incredibly unorganized. But, when you have class one time per week for twelve weeks and two of the class periods are almost identical I think you are really hurting the educational value of the course. Of course German professors are held less accountable than their American counterparts, and the course is free, so perhaps "you get what you pay for" applies here.

My frustration is not just that there seems to be no reason or rhyme to why we talk about certain themes. The themes are interesting enough, and repetition is particularly good for me, an American student, trying to learn the language--I pick something new up each time. In principle though I find the repetition obnoxious. What actually really gets me are two things: 1) most of the class time from here on out is made up of student presentations on the themes for each class period, and 2) the professor has a really tenuous control of the class room and the discussion.

I'll talk about why the presentations bother me (and I know other American students having the same frustrations). What it means when student presentation make up the bulk of the class is that as a student you only get out of it what the other students put into it. If students decide to have a really weak presentation because the topic doesn't interest them or they have better things to do, then you learn absolutely nothing you didn't already know. You also risk covering material well outside the focus of the class (which you took, after all, because it's focus interested you). Our first presentation was relatively good today, and I understand every word the presenter said (which was heartening, to say the least). Unfortunately I believe the student who presented today is one of the brighter students in the class, and his presentation was cut short (because of poor time management by our professor, who was also twenty minutes late). Moreover, it is impossible for him to be more of an expert on the subject than our professor, and so he of course got a few facts confused in his presentation that our professor tried to clear up.

I think this system is really a backward way at getting at education. I understand the merit of having oral presentations from students (and personally enjoy giving them, I'm sick) but as a student I don't want to rely on the other students in the class to provide me the bulk (let's say over 50%) of my education. Our professor is quite an expert in his field, and I would much rather here what he has to say on the subject of measurements of freedom and democracy than what a student who spent three hours looking online for information can tell me. I just think the depth of knowledge the expert provides is much better--and sure all of that won't stick with me for the rest of my life, but it is less likely I'll miss something really important or really interesting when I hear it straight from the expert.

Maybe I'm cynical, but I don't think my fellow students, or myself, have the ability to add enough meaningful material to a class to warrant devoting half of our class time to our oral presentations. They're interesting and I like seeing what other students find interesting... but when I can hear it straight from the expert with in depth knowledge, and pose my questions directly to him, I find that much more interesting.

My second frustration applies to my particular professor. He seems like a really bright guy, and he is incredibly nice, but our class discussions are very off-topic, drawn out, and often circular. He doesn't usually do anything to inhibit this, though he does occasionally cut them short. In fact, usually somehow he contributes to the circularity by answering a student's question with "you could be right" or "you have a good point" and then not bothering to defend against the student's objection to his material.

A particular example of this is the endless discussion we are having in class about whether or not a democracy can exist without a free market economy. There are two students who always say that a socialist economy can certainly have a free democracy, and then a few students who bother to disagree. Our professor, who works for a research institution that formulated a definition of democracy (and a quantative measure for that definition as well) that includes the presence of a free market, never defends the inclusion of free markets in the definition of democracy--not even hypothetically. Perhaps he believes it shouldn't be included in the definition himself, but somehow I feel for the purpose of class he should at least be able to provide a few justifications for its inclusion (like how it is a good indicator of the overall freedom in a society, how a socialist economy hinders press freedoms, etc.). Instead he just says that's the way it is, and leaves other students to argue with these students and the argumentation always goes circular because none of the students have the background to further the argument. And the professor doesn't provide them any further ground to help move the discussion toward a resolution.

I think why I am so frustrated is I find this an infinitely interesting discussion. Our professor let the same five arguments get thrown around for about 10 or 15 minutes (and this happens just about every class session) and then moved on without any resolution to the argument. Today, I tried to speak up in class, but by the time I figured out that we were still talking about the same thing as five minutes before (I was astounded by this) the professor had finally brought the discussion to a halt. My German isn't quick enough yet, but I think I want to give my oral report in this class now on the justification for keeping the existence of the free market as a criteria, and as an indicator, of democracy in a given state. I'm not sure I'm particularly convinced that theoretically a free market is a pre-requisite to a democracy, but I believe empirically that is certainly true, and it'd be fun to really have a good debate about it with facts and theoretical examples with the students who insist otherwise, because as of now their opinion that the free market isn't necessary isn't challenged by our professor, and barely so by the other students in the class.

I just feel as if the educational quality in my American university classes are so far, much higher, than my German university class. But I am comparing my best American classes with my, by far, worse class in Germany so far--and this comparison may be a bit unfair. But I'm not the only American student feeling these frustrations.

On the bright side the class helps with my German infinitely and that is much more important for me to learn while I am here than the history and development of democratic indicators. Perhaps as my German gets better I'll enjoy the class more. I'm not sure, because disorganized and chaotic is disorganized and chaotic, I don't care what language it's in.

But it's kinda cool my German is good enough I can be critical of the class... I've come a long way already.

Step to the Left, Now Step to the Right

2006-11-20T01:01:00.000+01:00

This weekend I have realized a few things about my German language skills.

1) My reading and writing abilities have really improved. I mean, amazingly. I looked at the essay I wrote for class this week and saw how all of these little things I never knew to do better I automatically had correctly formulated, and I was amazed. I wasn't making the same mistakes I was making at the beginning of the semester, and now I see that I am starting to really formulate more precisely my thoughts into German instead of having to just always say "that's close enough to what I want to say". That is a great feeling.

My reading has improved a lot as well while I read a 150 page novel in German in about ten hours. I didn't understand the whole thing, and it wasn't Goethe or anything, but I got the gist of the book in 10 hours of reading it, without hardly looking up any words. My "first sweep" of the book took me a lot closer to what happened and what was funny/important than my first sweep of any previous German text I have read. It was impressive to see how many fewer words I had to look up, how many words I picked up by context and how often I would say "I bet you this word means x because it is related to these other three words I know".

It is hard to see how these improvements actually happen, because every day it is just a bunch of small imperceptible steps. But they are happening and I saw it this weekend.

2) I'm not perfect yet. I retain the motivation to improve because after attempting to read part of Guenter Grass's "Mein Jahrhundert" I realized just how far my German has to go. Grass is a great author, I'm sure, but for someone with 2.5 years of German he is almost impenetrable. I wish I could read it and understand it, but I can't. I think I'm worse off than some of the other kids in the class in that regard, because they aren't really that interested in the literature--they just want to learn German, which is fine. But I want to read German like I read English and really soak it up. Would I love Guenther Grass novels the way I love Steinbeck novels? I don't know, but I really want to get my German there so I can find out. It's a whole new world of literature to explore. Plus, I have been to a ton of the places in all of these German novels, and that is really cool. (Sadly I've never been to Salinas)

3) Understanding spoken German. Hmm. This is infinitely better. We braved watching our first movie without subtitles for fun the other day, and it wasn't terribly difficult to understand. I got a lot of the jokes, and followed the plot fairly carefully with only a few of those "what was that?" moments. The movie had one of those open-ended endings and so I didn't understand that in German, but in general, I was impressed at how much of the rapid fire conversations between characters I was able to pick up. My passive German is really getting a lot better, and that is really good.

4) Pronunciation and speaking skills. I have a lot of work here to do and this is where my German lags far behind. I think my writing, reading and listening skills are all two or three levels advanced from my speaking skills. This is particularly frustrating for me because in English speaking is no problem, ask anyone who knows me, I speak quite often ;-)

More specifically, I am fairly good at constructing arguments in English on the fly thanks to debate, but when I find myself mired in a debate in German (and make no mistake, mired is the right word) I flounder. I come off as much too partisan because I can't negotiate the intricacies of complex subjects yet (instead of saying I think global warming is a problem that is probably over hyped today and deserves less attention than it is currently getting I wind up saying that global warming isn't really important and we shouldn't waste our time).

My pronunciation causes conversations with strangers to be somewhat strained because I have a hard time hearing how I say words and making sure I get it right with them so that they understand exactly what I mean (though I swear sometimes I have it really close and some people are just snooty about it and want me to say it perfect even though they understand, this is rare, and probably a misconception, but when I'm frustrated that is what I think).

I just need more practice. I need to speak more. Sometimes I have moments of brilliance where I just get on a roll, and they are coming more often. I just need to keep working at it because with enough practice they will become the norm and not the exception.

In general I would say I am finally noticing how much my German has improved and really appreciating it. I feel much more confident in my German, and it is about time because having confidence in my language skills opens up many more possibilities to me and makes every opportunity easier to take advantage of. It's just starting to feel like I am doing more than just developing language skills, but rather actually learning and engaging another culture.

"Die schlimmste Zeit ist vorbei. Willkommen in die neue Zeit!"

That isn't grammatically correct, but good enough right?

Ohne Untertitel--bist du verrückt?

2006-11-20T00:57:00.000+01:00

18.11.2006
Tagen bis Kelly: zu viel

Deutsche Film, ohne Untertitel, ist das möglich? Das ist eine echte Frage. Es kann sein und es war. Kathe, Jeff, und ich schauten "Der bewegte Mann" heute Abend an. Der Film handelt von ein Mann mit vielen verschiedenen Frauen. Er ist rausgeschmissen und dann schläft er bei ein schwul Mann. Es war ein bisschen verrückt, witzig und viel Spass aber ein bisschen schwer manchmal zu verstehen. Aber jedenfalls, gut.

Ich fing mit "Der Zimmerspringbrunnen" heute an. Das Buch ist lustig. und gefällt mir ABER ich fühlte ein bisschen schlecht weil es von ein Streit zwischen Mann und Frau handelt. Ich könnte nur an Kelly denken und sorgte mich um unsere Verbindung. Wie wird ihr Besuch sein? Gut, wirklich gut, ich weiß aber diese Morgen fühlte ich kalt. Dann sie rief mich an und ich fühlte viel besser.

That Can't Be German? Can it?

2006-11-17T17:56:00.000+01:00

One of the craziest things about being in Germany is constantly seeing how many things from Germany I knew about that already that I didn't know where German. I saw this crazy exhibit at a museum in Chicago and was blown away by it. I found it very fascinating, but thought it toed the line between science and art. Now, reading German headlines today, I found out I'm not the only one. Gunther von Hagens apparently has a lot of political enemies after opening up a so called "body factory" where he can continue his work of preserving bodies in this unique fashion. His detractors say that he certainly is using donor bodies for artistic purposes to make money, while his supporters say he is a scientific pioneer. A fascinating debate. Too bad the new "factory" is so far from me--they apparently have a full scale exhibit like the exhibit I saw in Chicago--and maybe even a tour. Morbid, but fascinating... which obviously has brought the man quite a bit of money.

I also had seen an e-mail forward, sent from my father about this machine. Here is a picture of the biggest machine in the world. It is 30 stories tall, and 700 feet long. It is amazing. It digs the earth to get coal out and works in some of the biggest coal mines in--- you guessed it--- Germany. I want to go see this thing in person, because it is so cool and because my father worked with similar machines and finds them interesting and I have always been fascinated by them because of that as well. I just never knew all of this stuff was German, but now that I'm in Germany I'm starting to see that Germany is pretty pervasive in the modern world, you just have to pay attention where things come from and you suddenly see it.

End of an Era

2006-11-17T00:30:00.000+01:00

Milton Friedman died today. This is notable to me because I was heavily influenced by reading his book "Capitalism and Freedom" last year for class. I didn't agree with all of his ideas, and I didn't understand his more advanced economic theories, but he challenged my previously strongly held liberal beliefs about big government and government intervention. I believe his work probably had this exact same effect on millions. His writing was clear, cogent and decidedly persuasive, and I enjoyed the book in its entirety.

But hopefully, where one great mind is lost another at this very moment is being found. I can't wait to read what they write.

Transformation

2006-11-16T16:28:00.000+01:00

When I have moved locations in the past I have always relished the chance of, excuse the cliche, "reinventing" myself. I thought it would be this tremendous opportunity each time to become someone completely different. When I first moved towns in high school I imagined myself being someone completely different, and thought I would actively pursue trying to change my actions, appearance, and other things in order to give people a different perception of myself. To some extent, I succeeded, I got rid of the awful haircut I wore all through middle school, and I came out of my shell a lot because being the new kid will just do that to you, but I still defined myself along the same lines as before--I was still introspective, over analytical, and very goal oriented, just as I was before. I changed, but most of the changes were, though for the better, completely involuntary and unintentional. The re-engineering project had failed.

When I went to college I had the same idea. I could be whoever I wanted because no one at the college knew me, no one had ever heard of me, and I was starting off brand new far away from anyone who previously knew I existed. It seemed like a good idea to be someone new, to try it out--the possibilities were endless. I could be outgoing and tell hilarious jokes all the time, or I could be an artsy, gothic type kid... you get the picture. I hung back in the first couple of months of college waiting to make my decision about how I was going to come out of my shell, but then something weird happened--I became me again, involuntarily, slowly it just happened that people started seeing the real me. No false projections or forced character traits could change what people had already seen, and I wasn't able to stop myself from being myself in the first place. This was a bit of a disappointment for me because I thought it would be really interesting to try something else out, a different style of existing I guess.

This is, of course, impossible. Something I really realized today very clearly.

Germany was the same story. I could be whoever I wanted here. I meet people all the time I'll never see again, and I meet people all the time who have never met me before, who don't even know where I come from, or anything about me at all. I could tell them I live in the South in the US, or Canada, or whatever and they would believe it. I could be a good basketball player, or a writer for a small magazine doing a piece on Germany. In short, if I put my mind to it I could most easily, of all places, reinvent myself here in Germany.

The fact that I didn't even bother to try says two really important things to me.

First, I'm comfortable with who I am now. My obsession with reinventing myself was less about wanting to be someone new to see how it is (though I've always wanted a window into someone else's brain, anyone else's really, just for comparison's sake) and it was more about being unsure of myself, insecure, and attempting to find a "self" that would be more acceptable to the rest of the world. This is a pretty common adolescent affliction, and I still feel this social pull from time to time--I'm not going to kid myself there. But the truth is, I am comfortable with the role I fill in a social setting, I know the advantages and disadvantages pretty well and I can try to maximize them and minimize them respectively. For most social situations I know what works for me to do and what completely doesn't work. It's a constantly modifying formula of course, for example I'm learning it's much easier to ask for help than I ever thought, but for the most part I have the hang of it. I like that feeling. It's one less thing in the world to worry about.

The second thing my lack of enthusiasm for reinventing myself says is that I've taken a longer term view on things, particularly my time in Germany. I look at my time in Germany as a time to accomplish a lot of practical goals for myself and I think I have matured enough to realize that pretending to be something that I'm not is going to hurt me in achieving those goals. I feel this constant drive to make the most out of this year because I want to have a lot of tangible things to show for it when I return home. I need to realize this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to pick up some new skills (language, travel, city living) and further my academic credentials (studying at a really great German university and working at a major think-tank). All of those things have superseded my desire to try to live in someone else's shoes for awhile. And, I think that is a good thing.

I think, interestingly enough, that while it is a nice theory--being able to reinvent yourself and change the way others see you--in practice it is a lot harder to do. For me, I'm pretty sure it would be impossible to actively change myself in any significant way for the sake of trying something different. I'm not saying change is impossible, but changing big things only for the sake of change seems to me very difficult to do.

Besides, I'm still changing all the time, it's just involuntary which sometimes makes me nervous, but at the same time I know it is all for the best and it makes me smile to know that there is always room to grow as a person.

But I'm not saying anything that someone else hasn't already said...

sie

2006-11-15T21:06:00.000+01:00

15.11.2006

Tage bis Kelly: genau 7

Unglaublich. Sie wird hier in sieben Tage sein. Ich vermisse sie so viel. Ich habe viel über sie heute gesprochen. Jede fragt mir--wann kommt sie? Ich sage immer: nicht bald genug. Ich verstehe jetzt viel besser wie ich brauche sie. Ich kann mit ihr über alles sprechen. Sie versteht mir. Sie ist gut für mich. Ich bin besser mit ihr. Netter, kluger, glücklicher, mutiger, alles...

Warum? Ich weiss nicht genau. Ich glaube nur jetzt beginne ich zu verstehen. Vor 3 Monaten haben wir "Tschüss" gesagt und es war ziemlich einfach. Drei Monaten und viele Schwierigkeiten später verstehen wir was 16,000km bedeutet, was ein acht Stunde Zeitunterschied ist, was für eine Liebe haben wir. Die nächste Monaten werden schwerer sein. Der Zukunft ist eine Fragezeichen noch und wir müssen warten und sehen. Ich habe die Hoffnung. Ich muss.

Ich glaube wir sind eine Himmel paar und wir sollen auf immer zusammen sein. Ich weiß nicht was passiert wird, aber hoffentlich bleiben wir zusammen. Ich liebe sie zu viel für es etwas anders zu sein.

Long Overdue Norway Photos

2006-11-15T00:02:00.000+01:00

I have been forgetting to post these for a long time. And because everyone loves photos more than my ramblings, here are some pretty pictures!

The palace of the Norwegian King. The guy has it made.

My great-great grandfather probably lived in a house that looked very much like this down a street that looked very much like this. This is from a museum that preserves traditional Norwegian buildings--whole.

This is just an artsy photo I took on the steps of a monument in Norway. Notice the rain on my lens--I like to think it is for dramatic effect and not the result of bad camera skills.

It's tough to see, but that is the Norwegian Honor Guard piling into that minivan to switch posts. Not very glamorous!

Holmenkollen. That's Norwegian for "giant ski jump". Okay, not really, this is a giant ski jump (I went all the way up to the top, quite a view) but not the biggest in the world. At the 1954 Winter Olympics in Oslo, when it was built, it was the biggest. Pretty cool.

Treffen!

2006-11-14T21:02:00.000+01:00

11.14.2006

Heute war wirklich gut. Mein Deutsch fühlt besser, und der Tag war relativ leicht. Ich habe mit Ralf und Christel gesprochen und getroffen. Ich habe mit meiner Suche nach eine Praktikum angefangen. Ralf denkt ich kann eine gute Praktikum finden. Ich denke das auch. Mein Treffen mit Christel war wirklich gut weil wir über Münchens Restaurants gesprochen haben. Ich freue mich so viel an Kellys Besuch. Es wird so toll sein. Christel sagt immer zu mir "Dein Kopf ist weg, mit deiner Freundin." Genau. Sie hat recht.

Meine Kurse sind relativ leicht auch, also es ist ganz okay. Mein politische Kurs ist viel Spass aber ganz anders. Ich lerne viele Woerter aber die Begriffe sind relativ einfach und nicht besonders kompliziert. Es ist mir egal, vielleicht es ist besser weil ich so viel mehr Zeit zu lesen und verstehen brauche. Aber egal. Jede Tag geht alles einfacher und ich finde das ganz toll.

Der Titel

2006-11-14T16:07:00.000+01:00

First, some clarification--in German "nur ein wort" means "only a word". Why did I choose that as the title for my blog?

A few reasons. First, and most superficially is that it is a cool sounding German phrase that also happens to be the title of a song by a pretty talented German band called "Wir Sind Helden" (We Are Heroes... a bit campy, I know). It's an almost annoyingly catchy little pop/indie rock song that I always seem to have stuck in my head for the last year or so whenever I dwell too much on German. I heard it on the radio in Germany once and it made me so happy to overhear the song, it made me just feel like this place was going to be that much less foreign.

While the sound espouses the power of just a single word (from my rough translation I think the word "yes" and all of its connotations is implied) I think the title in this case speaks to exactly the opposite. My feeling is that even if at the end of everyday I sat down and typed for two hours everything that had happened I would only be scratching the surface of what it is like to be here in Germany. I believe that. There are changes going on with me that I can't put into words, but I feel them happening and I learn things that suddenly hit me one day and I think "when did I figure that out" because it is all part of this deep process that is always working on so many levels. A quick example: I have an oral report coming up tomorrow on global warming in my German language class (just so we can practice giving these types of reports) and I was doing what I usually do before an oral report, running the arguments in my head and then finding the holes I need to fill in with research, statistics, or some other form of information. Except I was going it all in German, in my head, and it was coming so easy. My German is always improving, but the improvements occur first in my understanding, then in my internal understanding of German and finally manifest themselves in my ability to express myself. I'm on the cusp of another big leap and this is a constant process I find incredibly fascinating. And even after writing all of that--I still haven't begun to explain what it actually feels like.

In short, words are pretty futile to provide anything more than a glimpse into what is going on. But I have to try, because I am going through the experience and I would like to share that with others so they can understand maybe what it is like--if they are thinking of, or already have studied abroad, or if they know me and they want to know why I was crazy enough to come over here and what it is like to be somewhere so foreign.

The third reason I think it is a good title is that it reflects the duality of the blog. When I started the blog my idea was just to use it for photos and then to keep a running commentary in Germany of what it was like to be here. That has proven too difficult because I can't get it all down in German and it takes too long. I want to have a record for how I am feeling so when I look back at the end of the year I can see just what it was like. So the blog has rapidly become a bilingual creature, with photos for good measure, and that is reflected in the disparity between the URL and the title.

My final reason for choosing the title is that it expresses a degree of finiteness that I think is important to keep in perspective. I could easily have called the blog "Nur ein Jahr" (Only a Year) but I think in a backward way the use of the singular gets across that this situation is very unique and binds the blog to this specific purpose. I don't intend to continue this blog upon my return to the United States because, quite frankly, I won't have anything that interesting to write about aside from the normal day to day stuff that every other blog in the world talks about. But right now even if I write about normal stuff, I can slap a picture I took that day of an amazing Baroque church on the top of the post and it suddenly is interesting. In that sense this blog is "only a word" from me, and it is about Germany, Europe, me and how a year of combining them goes.

I can only hope to provide a glimpse of what it feels like for this small-town Montana boy to be dropped into the middle of a big European city thousands of miles away from everything familiar (except McDonald's, there's always one of those) for an entire year. Scary, exciting... adjectives fail the situation. And so, that's why this blog is here. Enjoy.

Sprucing Up

2006-11-13T23:05:00.000+01:00

Don't mind all the design changes over the next few days. I have some spare time so I decided to take advantage of the new, more powerful BloggerBeta (a symbol of growing power of Google, good or bad, you decide). At any rate, there is some cool stuff to work on to make this function better and look a little less plain I guess. Don't worry I'm not going to go overboard and use eight different fonts, list all of my friends' favorite colors on the right hand side, and link to everything on the web (though I will put up a few more links, I am sure of that). Just some minor changes to improve your reading experience... suggestions are welcome. Yell at me if it becomes difficult to read.

Veil of Ignorance

2006-11-13T20:32:00.000+01:00

The language barrier is really a veil of ignorance. As I have felt the language barrier slowly lifted I have begun to start noticing society wide differences between the United States and Germany that range from amusing, to bizarre. A few rough examples (because I'm still lifting the veil of ignorance I don't know all the details yet).

1) Socialism. Now I knew Germany was a socialist market-based economy but some of the weird ways in which this is manifested amaze me. A few quick examples--in the German constitution it states that everyone has a right to their possessions, but that all possessions are also available for the "good of the whole" (roughly translated). This stands in stark contrast to the U.S. Constitution (or did until the Kelo v. New London decision at any rate). The recent election (in which laws curbing the power of eminent domain) shows the ways in which Americans have a very different opinion on the matter of personal possessions and are, for lack of a better expression, very possessive of them.

Germans, as of lately, have been backing away from this kind of socialism and people are quietly starting to speak of the failure of the socialist model in Germany (an article in the Economist this week said as much). From what I have observed it seems a little far fetched, while the economy is saddled with high unemployment German firms remain pretty competitive, and German people seem pretty content with their life prospects. I will get a better feel for this as the year goes on.

A few other examples--easy access to higher education (completely contradicted by the three-tiered secondary school system), government stipendiums for study based solely on economic need (and a lot more generous than their American counterparts), a very progressive tax system (we're not talking Sweden here... but beware for the rich), and massive government transfer programs.

2) "Public" Institutions. The government has created what seems to me a crazy class of institutions called "öffentlich rechtliche Institutionen." The name of the game here is that these are quasi public institutions that citizens are required to pay for, but have complete administrative freedom. Particularly interesting is the German media system which may be one of the most unique in the world. While private stations exist, a lot of German media is on public radio and television stations. These stations are supported by a tax every German must pay for the possession of television (or a cable television connection in their home) every year. The tax is quite high (it comes to something around $30 a month). This is used to fund the "public" stations. Moreover, the quality of these public stations is regulated--by a quasi-government organization called, translated from German, the "Broadcast Legislature". This is where it gets crazy to me. The government petitions so called "socially relevant groups" to send a set number of representatives (based on their influence in any given area) to come to the "Rundfunkrat" and vote on broadcasting standards, audit the quality of the public stations, and review programs before they are aired to see if they meet quality standards and pass the censorship standards set out by the government (I think it is the gov. that makes these rules).

Aside from the interesting choice of censorship rules (which one can easily understand given Germany's political and cultural history, for example a ban on the glorification of war) I think there is a fundamental flaw in this whole "public" media system. It seems to transfer the power of the media from the people--which the marketplace gives through advertising revenues linked to ratings--to social elites that may or may not actually represent anyone. I put the question to my German professor when I said I would probably be hard pressed to find a "socially relevant group" that advocated for my specific TV viewing habits (if I had any, it was hypothetical). I said it is highly unlikely the "socially relevant group" that is supposed to represent men would accurately represent me--instead probably advocating for topless nightly news programs, or more sports (okay I might go for the sports... it's all TV is really good for anymore). The point is these groups are cultural elites that don't, in all likelihood, speak for the average television viewer at all. It'd be interesting to study how quickly the private television stations have risen in the ratings since they were legalized in 1984 and the "public" stations began facing stiff competition from the market.

Okay, that is all I have now, but expect more cultural rantings later. A lot of this stuff is becoming clear to me--and surprise, surprise, I am starting to form opinions on it, and revise them as I learn more. These just happen to be the latest.

And for the record it isn't all things I think are crazy. I think the German Supreme Court is set up quite brilliantly actually, with justices only allowed between the ages of 50 and 65 I believe, only allowed to serve one term, and elected, albeit indirectly, through a special session of the legislature. It provides an interesting counter model to the US system (which has its merits as well). Food for thought, room for another post later.

Update

2006-11-11T14:52:00.000+01:00

Once again I have neglected my English readers. I apologize. I actually haven't updated because of a lack of time--I seem to have enough time--I just haven't had anything really interesting to report. But I guess that isn't true either, it is all of these little subtle things that I am excited about but really probably don't seem that exciting from the outside.

Some examples:

1) Watched a German movie, entirely in German and understood it. It was fun, funny, and surreal sitting through it and realizing they were speaking German and not English and I wasn't completely lost.

2) Walked by the same billboard I have walked by every day for the past three weeks on my way to the subway, and understood what it said this time. It was a really funny joke in German, and it made me laugh.

3) Read an incredibly difficult novel by German author Christa Wolf. I dind't understand all of it, and I don't think I appreciated it's literary quality because my German just isn't good enough... but I read the book. The fact that I can read a 100 page book in German within a week is saying a lot about how far my language skills have come.

4) Talked to some students in my class at the German University. One really nice girl from Poland commiserated with me about the structure of classes at German Universities. Our professor is particularly chaotic with the lecture every day and doesn't really hold discussions very well in class. I still enjoy the class, but it is a whole different atmosphere from American classes. (Oh yeah, we talked in German...so cool).

5) Got over my terror of asking for help when I am shopping/eating in a restaurant/lost in the city. My German is passable now, not great yet, but passable and communicating with almost any German is possible with a little effort on my part and a little patience on theirs. Up next--talking to all the people in my house I haven't talked to because of my self-consciousness with my German.

6) Kelly visits soon. No need to elaborate (and that, I suppose isn't a subtle exciting thing, just flat out exciting).

7) Here's a shocker. I have given up on trying to pass my Microeconomics class. It is way beyond my grasp and the language barrier means I won't be getting it any sooner without working several hours a week. I will still attend the lectures on some weeks (when the topic is something I think I can follow) because it will only help build my economic vocab for next semester. I just really got unlucky and the only econ course I could take was well beyond my ability. After spending three hours frustrated with the homework I realized my life will be easier if I spent my time focusing on my other classes (my politics class has REALLY helped my vocabulary and understanding of German texts) and working hard there I'll learn more, and I won't have to beat my brain trying to learn something I could learn much easier next semester.

8) Started the internship search. I'm crossing my fingers, there are a lot of cool education reform advocacy groups I have found in Munich that I would love to work for if they'll have me. We'll see how much of a barrier my tenuous grasp on German (and how much of a selling point my strengths in English) are. Also, I definitely don't want to work the whole nine weeks off (6 seems pretty reasonable to me, maybe even 4 depending on how many hours a week). It just feels good that I am moving in the direction toward making this a reality.

9) Started eating healthier. I had been just sticking with foods I knew and not really diversifying my diet much from pasta with meat sauce and PB & J for the last few months. Now I am starting to explore all of the culinary delights at the local grocery store (albeit a bit slow, I'm always slow to try new food). So far I'm a fan of "vollkornbrot" (whole wheat bread, but really different than in the US) and Bavarian sausage with this great French mustard. I have to start cooking some meat and finding a regular breakfast food. Also, I bought a water cooker and am now addicted to drinking tea (with lots of sugar).

10) In general I am finally starting to feel "settled" here. I can get around and understand how most things work fairly well (post, bank, shopping, cooking, laundry, etc.) and so those things have now become routine and not a daily trial. Now I feel like I can be more exploratory since my feet are firmly on the ground and I can start reaching out and doing the things I want to do. It's a good feeling, a good transition, and it directly coincides with a drastic improvement in my comfort level with the German language.

11) I'm starting to get the general mid-semester sickness I get where my body just freaks out for a week. I was really stressed last week and bit my tongue in my sleep a lot at night and so now it is pretty tender (which doesn't help with the pronunciation thing). Anyway... that's kind of boring to hear about I guess!

12) There was one more thing of note to put here... oh yes, I am starting research into my big project for the semester--a look at the German secondary school system. We are conducting interviews on directors from the different school types in Germany in the next few weeks and then putting together a summary of what the problems and challenges facing German schools are, and what some of the proposed solutions are. I am pretty excited to dive into this because it also coincides with what I am really interested in writing my senior thesis on. Secondary education is an issue that has always been near and dear to my heart. I can't wait to get a jump on that.

Das Rezept

2006-11-09T18:00:00.000+01:00

08.11.2006
Das Rezept des Spaß:
1 Flasche Rotwein (Dornfelder etwas, es schmeckt wie Kool-aid)
1 deutsches Film (Eine Komödie, es handelt vielleicht von ein ex-DDR Sportreporter)
2 Freunden (Jeff und Kathe, natürlich)
Spat Abend

Anrühren (mischen) alles zusammen und wart!

Also, schauen Jeff, Kathe, und ich das Film, es heißt "Alles auf Zucker" an. Es war so viel Spaß weil wir das ganzes Film verstehen. Es war eine interessante Komödie und die Witze waren wirklich gut. Das Film gefällt uns und es war unglaublich wie viel wir verstanden. Vielleicht 80%. war zu mir verständlich. Super! Mein Deutsch ist so viel besser. Vielleicht weil wir ein sehr schwer Buch, das heißt "Was Bleibt" von Christa Wolf, gerade lasen und so jetzt alles ist ziemlich einfach und leicht. Das ist ein Möglichkeit. Ich weiß nicht genau aber ich finde es alles ganz toll!

Das Gespräch

2006-11-07T17:55:00.000+01:00

7.11.2006
Heute nahm ich meine Politkkurse teil. Es war Spaß. Ich verstand viel! Unsere Debatte war interessant obwohl ein paar Leute immer über blöde Dinge sprachen. Ich sprach mit ein andere Studentin, die nehmt die Kurse auch teil. Sie kommt aus Polen und war sehr nett. Sie fand unser Dozent ein bisschen anders auch. Sie sagt deutsche Uni ist immer ein bisschen anders und Deutsche Studenten interessieren sich immer mit eine Globalsicht. Sie denken immer über die Ausnahmen und nicht so viel über die Regeln selber. Es war ein bisschen schwer für mich zu verstehen, aber ich glaube das ist was sie sagte. Sie sagt auch dass mein Deutsch gut war und fragt mich ein bisschen über Amerika. Es war ein kurze Treffen aber es war gut. Ich muss mit mehr Unistudenten treffen statt immer andere Amis. Dies weg geht mein Deutsch besser, schneller. Jedes Tag fühle ich selbstsicher mit mein Deutsch. Ich lerne so viel so schnell. Das gefällt mir!

Prayer

2006-11-05T17:29:00.000+01:00

I'm not a very religious person but I don't think it hurts to wish the best for others from time to time and to appeal to whatever form of higher power you believe in for help in certain circumstances.

With that said I will be praying, in my own peculiar way, for my big sister and her husband who will be shipping off to Iraq at the end of this year and was recently recalled into the armed forces after serving in Afghanistan.

My sister dropped him off at the army base today, and so today for her was a dark day. I can only wish the best for both of them.

Böse

2006-11-04T15:53:00.000+01:00

04.11.2006
Heute gehen Alex und mir ins Kino zu "Borat" schauen. Das Film war lustig aber ein bisschen beschämend für Amerika. Nach dem Film trafen wir eine nette iranische Frau. Wir wissen sie war nicht deutsch weil sie mit uns zuerst sprach! Sie war wirklich nett und wer sprachen über das Film. Es war gut zu sprechen mit ein andere "Münchener" anders als unsere Programm. Nach das Treffen sprachen Alex und ich im U-Bahn (auf Deutsch) über irgendetwas. Eine Frau lachte uns aus. Alex hat sie gesehen und fragte "Was?". Sie sagte, oh nichts. Dann sagte sie: "Ihr Deutsch klingt so schlecht!" Wir sagten nur "oh, danke." Sie spracht mit ihre Tochter dann sagte "Deutsch ist schwer, ich weiß." Wir entschuldigten uns für unsere Deutsch und dann sprachen Englisch.

Ich fühlte ganz schlimm nach das Geschehnis. Warum sagt man etwas wie die Frau tat? Alex und ich genieren uns wegen unserer Deutsch. Wir probieren und wir können gar nichts anders machen. Wir müssen die Sprache lernen und das ist die einzige Weg.

Fehler!

2006-11-03T15:49:00.000+01:00

03.11.2006
Ich fehle mein Vorlesung heute. Ich fuehle ganz schlecht und total faul. Als bin ich aufgewacht fühlte ich schlimm. Ich weiß nicht warum aber es war so. Meine Träume sind immer komisch letzten. Menschen sind da dass ich seit Jahren niemals ueber legte. Freunden von Schule als ich im 7 Klasse oder so war. Ich verstehe das gar nicht aber ich glaube ich habe Heimweh. Deutschland gefällt mir, es ist schön und Spaß aber auch ist Heim. Ich vermisse meine Familie. Sie brauchen mich und jetzt glaube ich vielleicht ich brauche sie. Komisch weil sie mein Grund waren zu im Oregon statt Montana studieren. So ist das Leben. (Ich weiß die Deutsch hier war ein bisschen schlecht, Entschuldigung!)

Einsam, nochmal

2006-11-02T15:46:00.000+01:00

02.11.2006
Heute war total einsam. Kein Jeff, kein Katherine, kein Alex, nur mich. Ich denke viele ueber Kelly heute nach. Sie kommt in zwanzig Tage aber nicht bald genug. Ich kann ihr Besuch noch nicht vorstellen. Es wird wie ein Traum sein. Ich warte und warte ich habe die Tage gezaehlt. Zu viele. Ohne sie bin ich OK aber nicht besonders gut, nicht so gut wie ich kann sein.

In andere Nachrichten mein Deutsch geht besser. Wir lesen jetzt "Was bleibt" ein gut aber schwer deutscher Roman. Ich verstehe fast gar nichts bis jetzt. Traurig. Es wird besser sein.

Halloween

2006-11-01T15:40:00.000+01:00

01.11.2006
Gestern Abend war viel Spass. Es gab ein Party in mein Haus mit alle meine Mitbewohnerin und die andere Amis. Alex, Katherine, Jeff und ich gingen zusammen. Kathe trug ein Telefonkostum. Ich trug mein "Spiegelhemd". Wir trinken ein paar Biere und waren in bisschen albern (silly). Wir tanzten aber die Musik war total Scheiße. Der so genannte DJ spielte nur schlechte Hip-Hop remixes die ganze Nacht. Ich sprach mit viele Leute und das war spasslich. Ich tanzte 2-step mit Kathe und Jitterbug mit Christi (ein andere Montana-er) aber Jitterbug war schwer--der Tansaal war zu klein mit zu viele Leute. Ich sprach mit Ian für 15 Minuten und das war auch toll. Er ist nett, und Rebecca und Eva auch. Ich trank ein bisschen zu viel und ging um 2 Uhr ins Bett. Ich schaute LOTR III für 1 Stunde an und dann schlief ein.

Ich fühlte gut in Deutschland. Ich vermisse Kelly aber jeden Tag bringt sie näher. Uni gefällt mir und ich finde meine Kurse sehr interessant. Ich muss mehr fleißig sein. Ich habe viel zu tun aber bald ist Weihnacht und eine kleine Ferien. Schoen. Ich kann nicht warten.

Debate

2006-10-31T19:19:00.000+01:00

I miss debate. I was sitting in my LMU political science class today and we were having a discussion concerning what constitutes a democracy and the class quickly divided into two camps. Surprisingly the majority of students were of the opinion that a democracy is more about the quality of life of the citizens than about specific political institutions. The justification for this position was that cultural differences mean that some institutions that our democratic model called for might not be so important (certain types of freedom may be less valued in some cultures and so may be diminished almost willingly by the people, or perhaps a tradition of a monarchy with some power in addition to an elected body may also exist--which seemingly undermines some of the democratic principles of the model we were discussing).

I sat through this discussion thoroughly of the mindset that while some forms of government may be perfectly acceptable for their citizens and bring a good quality of life and support good governance that doesn't necessarily qualify them as democracies. Moreover I believe that democracies radically decrease the chances of extremely bad governance occurring (they might not bring the best, but they won't bring the worst either). I just don't agree with what one student stated, that a government that is unelected but supports freedoms, is responsive to its citizens and shares power can constitute a democracy. I find the election fairly central to the concept of a government, and moreover I couldn't really envision this hypothetical government actually existing for a number of practical problems.

But I didn't think of any of this until the discussion was long passed because during the discussion I was busy just focusing on understanding where the discussion was going. My German was good enough to follow it fairly precisely (much better than I had expected) and so I understood what was going on, but at the same time I couldn't formulate my objections in German to add to the discussion in any way. As I get more confident with my German I will hopefully be able to do this. But I can't now, and I was frustrated.

This frustration led me to realize how much I miss debate. Not just the competitive parliamentary debate I participated in the last two years of college and found time-consuming, frustrating, and exhilarating all at once, but just general debates between two people of very different opinions and reasonable intelligence, or comparable language abilities. I have not really debated politics with anyone, except my mom once or twice, since arriving here in Germany and I find myself missing those discussions.

In my class with other Americans I often raise a point or two when the general America bashing starts--which inevitably begins when we learn something really cool the German government does for its citizens that America doesn't do for its own (or seemingly doesn't do, one such thing was a monthly stipend to parents of 150 euros, but America has a similar, less generous measure in the form of a tax write off--it is just a more subtle way of reaching the same conclusion, and slightly less generous--but we don't pay 19% VAT and 25% income tax either).

In situations like these I always find myself sympathizing with the least defended side (in my class with Americans it is always several students praising Germany and criticizing America, in my LMU class it was several students favoring a classification system of only two categories for democracies (democratic, undemocratic) over a more gradiated classification system). It isn't that I am particularly in favor of the side with less supporters (I have my qualms about America as well) but more that I believe the discussion only yields a more truthful result when each side is given a balanced defense. If it is fair to criticize America for not providing a stipend to parents then it is fair to criticize Germany for taking money from lower middle class, or poor people in the form of a high VAT and giving that money to parents in the highest economic classes in the form of this parent stipend. That is how the system actually works, but the students praising Germany didn't necessarily want to talk about that point as much as they wanted to talk about America's lack of any such stipend. But, you have to look at the program you are praising carefully before you say it should be implemented in an entirely different culture/political climate--and if you dropped the same stipend into the US I think many Americans would be against it because of the tax raises necessary to provide it, and the seemingly silly idea of the government giving wealthy parents a monthly stipend.

The point is that I am a firm believer that moderation and compromise in the realm of politics is a boring, but usually the most viable course of action. The only way to reach a good compromise is to give both sides a fair look and evenly weigh the costs and benefits of each. If, even after a good defense, one side still seems overwhelming better (perhaps classifying governments in a black and white matter instead of shades of gray) then one can feel even more secure in the decision to support that side. But you don't know until you put your ideas to the test. It isn't personal, it isn't about being right or wrong, it is about finding the truth, the best solution, the optimal outcome.

And that is what I think a really good debate can do--find the truth, or at least move a lot closer to it. I can't wait for my language skills to improve to the point I can start living up to my philosophy more.

Too Much English (Or Ten Random Thoughts)

2006-10-30T20:12:00.000+01:00

I realize I have been neglecting my English readers (hi Mom!) lately by writing mostly in German. To be quite honest it isn't because my German has gotten especially better, but mostly because I am required to write in German for class, and don't have time (as of lately) to write out a post about how my life is going in English. Now I do have a bit of a chance to catch everyone up on the highlights.

1) The situation with my LMU classes is completely cleared up. The requirements for the politics course were lowered for me (I will confirm this tomorrow) because the mistake was with the LMU and not with my program or me (the course was falsely listed as a Grundstudium in the course book). I will only have to give a fifteen minute oral presentation to get my grade (like in most classes at the LMU). My director said this was only fair because this is what all the other students in our program have to do for their LMU classes. That is a big relief because an oral presentation is much more manageable than a paper in German. At least at this point.

2) Bonn was a very fruitful trip, though short and eventful as well. I learned that scholarship I am getting is actually (I had only suspected this) directly funded by German taxpayers. It is a program to stir up academic interest in German universities. The meeting was fun we got really great food (we took a boat cruise down the Rhein and ate Chinese) and met some of the really great people who administrate the scholarship program. I also learned how I can make some contacts that could help me obtain the internship I am looking for in February and March.

3) I feel entirely less overwhelmed. I am starting to look at ways I can improve my German myself and starting to be patient and accept that all of my courses are going to require more effort than I am used to giving. I am also going to have to satisfy myself with not understanding the texts we are reading nearly as precisely as I understand English texts. That isn't the point of being here--the point is to build my language skills. I have to realize, and sometimes it amazes me, that every little thing I learn over here is a triumph of my language skills. I remember relaying a story about a church in Munich to someone in the States and realizing that it was the first time I had ever spoken about that particular story in any language other than German. I felt kind of happy about that.

4) I have realized my understanding of German is much better than my ability to speak or write it and have decided I need to force myself to speak more German in class, and with other people. I am going to start attending some "conversation tables" and try to put some real effort into being able to speak better.

5) The people at Deutsche Bahn (the German train company) are really nice. We left our tickets on our previous train after we switched trains in Stuttgart on our way to Bonn and they called the other train, looked for our ticket, found it, and shipped it to Bonn so we could use it to come home the next day. Completely unexpected--I was sure we'd have to buy new tickets.

6) The next three weeks are jam packed with things to do. I have to translate my resume into German, write a letter of intent for an internship I want to apply for (in German!), attend a meeting of DAAD scholarship holders in Munich (hopefully do some networking, maybe find an internship that way), prepare for Kelly to visit (buy subway tickets, scope out restaurants and other relaxing/fun things I can't wait to do), conduct some interviews with people at several different K-12 schools in Munich and make contacts with people at the government offices of education.

7) I bought my plane ticket home for Christmas. I'm much more homesick than I ever expected to be. I like Germany and everything, but I also think it took coming to Germany (and other circumstances) to awaken in me some really warm feelings about where I am from as well. I'm not unhappy here by any stretch--but I also am not dragging my feet about going home. And I can't wait to show my whole family everything I've seen and done. I will feel like an explorer returning after a journey into the unknown and I really look forward to that!

8) I'm tentatively thinking of writing my senior thesis on the politics of school reform in the US and Germany. I'm checking out possible texts and possible research now to see how viable of a topic it is and what I want to specifically write about. It is something dear to my heart.

9) This semester is in no way going to be relaxing as I had thought it would be. I am really pushing myself with a lot more work than a lot of the other students in the program. I promised myself I would slowdown after the rat race that was last year, but the way things fell together this semester that won't go like I had planned. I must slow down next semester and take only the classes I must to maintain my status and keep my German progressing. Otherwise I'll focus on the research for my thesis next semester and trying to learn what it means to relax a little better.

10) The other day it hit me that in a year I'll be registering for classes for my last semester of undergraduate study. It seems like yesterday I was trying to figure out what student loans were and whether or not I should bring all my Hawaiian shirts to college. Now I'm in Germany. Sometimes you blink and you go halfway around the world, and I'm starting to realize that when you are young life moves incredibly fast--sometimes too fast. But at least there is never a dull moment!

Bonn Fotos

2006-10-29T13:28:00.000+01:00

I didn't take these photos because I didn't have time to take photos while in Bonn, but these will have to work. Bonn is really beautiful, much more beautiful than I expected.

This is a castle looking out over the river. There are tons of these up and down the Rhein.

This is the Rhein as it cuts through the city of Bonn, the former capital of West Germany. I took a boat down the river and ate dinner on it during the DAAD conference. It was really cool.

Deutsche Gedanken

2006-10-28T22:16:00.000+02:00

28.10.2006

Heute fahren wir nach München zurück. Unser Konferenz war ziemlich gut. Wir trafen mit viele neue Leute die bekamen auch ein DAAD Stipendium. Die DAAD war wirklich nett und eine von die Direktoren, der Herr Schaefer heißt, war sehr komisch. Unsere Seminare war Spaß und nicht so langweilig aber wir wussten schon die Informationen wir bekamen.

Der Rhein ist wunderschön. Unser Zug fahrt direkt entlang den Fluss. Es war wie "The Gorge" im Oregon aber schöner.

Ich fühle wie mein Deutsch ist ganz schlecht. Die Leute im DAAD waren viel besser als mich. Wird mein Deutsch irgendwann besser werden? Ich glaube, aber es geht nicht so schnell als ich dachte. Das ist schwer für mich weil ich kann schwere Konzepten verstehen, und sogar auf Deutsch auch, aber ich kann nicht über diese Konzepten reden, debatten, streiten, oder neue Konzepten entwickeln. Das ist schwer. Ich fühle wie ich vermisse viele neue Ideen, Begriff, und Theorien in den USA. Ich werde hier nicht so viel lernen. Ich will lernen, ich mag lernen, und ich vermisse lernen.

Ich lüge, weil ich viele Konzepten lernen hätte. Jetzt studieren wir die Deutsche Verfassung und Grundgesetz. Die beide sind ganz interessant. Ich lerne viele Deutsch auch, aber ich fühle wie ich muss immer mehr und mehr lernen. Ich lerne ein bisschen Ökonomie und Politik auch. Und auch, lese ich gute deutsche Bücher. Das ist wirklich toll. Ich lese Deutsch jetzt viel schneller asl in den USA. So es geht besser, ich habe nur Ungeduld. Ich muss warten, ich habe Zeit im Deutschland. Vielleicht jetzt fühle ich "Culture Shock". Das ist ganz normal, natürlich. Es wird besser sein.

Meine Reise nach Bonn

2006-10-27T14:12:00.000+02:00

27.10.2006

Heute wachte ich sehr früh auf (4.30) so ich könnte um 6.00 Uhr bei Bahnhof sein. Der Bahn ist viel Spaß und gefällt mir. Unsere Reise geht gut aber wir machten ein kleine Fehler. Wir lassen unsere Fahrkarte im unserem erstem Zug nach unser Umstieg. So im Zug nach Bonn hatten wir kein Fahrschein. Das ist eine Problem, natürlich. Wir fragten der Mann des Zug (er kontrolliert die Fahrscheine) und er sagte er wird den anderen Zug anrufen. Wenn unser Fahrschein gefunden ist, haben wir Glück, wenn nicht, sind wir machtlos. Dank sei Gott unsere Fahrschein war gefunden und alles war in Ordnung. Na, ja es war noch wirklich ein Abenteuer fuer ein paar Stunde!

Feiertag?

2006-10-26T21:57:00.000+02:00

26.10.2006
Kein Unterricht heute! Ich bin zum Marktkauf (mit Katherine) gegangen und habe mein Zimmer geputzt. Ich hätte sehr viel Angst weil ich muss mit Ralf treffen und sprechen über meine Unikurse. Die beide sind Hauptstudiums und nicht so einfach als ich habe gedacht. Ich dachte es wird zu viel arbeit sein. Ralf sagte (zu mir) ich muss nicht befürchten , ich muss nur ein Referat halten und dann bekomme ich eine Note. Super!

Ich kaufte viele heute und druckte im LMU Computer-Raum auch. Das war ein kleine Abenteur, weil es nicht so einfach war. Das Login ist komisch bei LMU-die Benutzername ist mein ganz e-mail Adresse. und ich habe das vergisst. Der Drucker funktioniert, aber, und so alles war OK. Ich probierte auch Deutsch Fernsehen, aber mein TV-Receiver ist nicht Deutsch, sondern amerikanisch und so es funktioniert nichts. Ich dachte das Receiver könnte mit die beiden funktionieren (amerikanisch und deutsch) aber das war falsch. Am Abend bereite ich für meine Reise nach Bonn. Ich gehe zum DAAD Versammlung im Bonn. Es soll viel Spaß sein.

A Vent

2006-10-24T20:58:00.000+02:00

Okay. I think today I am probably close to the most frustrated I have been since arriving here. Today I got to sleep in until 10:00 AM and was looking forward to taking my one incredibly easy politics course today and then going shopping and doing my homework and generally being lazy and relaxed. Then reality kicked in.

I showed up for my class today and found out a couple of things pretty quickly. First, I found out that yet again I had taken a "Hauptstudium" instead of a "Grundstudium". This means that the work load and knowledge level are on par with end of undergraduate studies in the U.S. (300-400 level courses). This of course would be no problem in the US, but all of the courses are in entirely in German and that was my second reliazation. I found myself entirely over my head in this class. I didn't understand most of what the professor spoke about today and we were just going over the course plan. In my economics class I understood most of the lecture, but this professor was much harder to understand and the concepts were incredibly more abstract. I couldn't keep up in my little vocab notebook writing down all the words I didn't know.

After the class I spoke with the professor and he told me I was welcome to take the course even if I didn't understand everything. That was very nice but to get credit for the class I also have to write a 10-15 page paper (in German), perform a fairly simple statistical analysis of democratic indicators, and give a fifteen minute oral report over my 10-15 page paper. There is no way I can do that and maintain a strong level of study in my other four courses.

What frustrates me about this situation is that I kind of have been left to hang out to dry by my program, or at least that is how I feel. I was assured both of the courses at the LMU I am taking were "Grundstudium" and so of the easier type, and instead both turned out to be "Hauptstudium." I feel kind of stupid I didn't just take the art history class here that is much easier than everything else and instead jumped into a university course. It would have been easier, my German would have improved, and I wouldn't have had as much stress. Now I am in over my head with two courses that are much harder than I expected with the one being nearly impenatrable due to the language barrier.

I know something will get worked out and maybe I'll just wind up taking the exam for the Economics class and going to the other class just to audit it. And hoping that I pass the economics course. I just feel really low today. I sat in that German class and felt like a complete idiot because I couldn't say a damn thing about what was going on and all the other students could easily ask questions and make points pertinent to our discussion. I was just trying to figure out what was going on.

I guess it boils down to me feeling incredibly over my head here and just being really aggravated at how much I don't know. I feel like I'm not learning German quickly enough and no matter how hard I try there is only so quickly my brain can pick it up. And it isn't quickly enough. I'm just kind of floundering trying to catch my German up and be able to lead my day to day life.

Of course that isn't true and there are flashes of brilliance in my German. I mean, yesterday, completely on my own, I found out how to print in the computer lab without having to speak English to anyone and asking three different people detailed questions. I could never have done that when I first arrived. It's getting better, but not how I had it planned in my head and I'm impatient because I really wish I could study the measurements of democracy while I was here, I think the course will be fascinating, but I have to face the fact that I am incredibly limited by my linguistic skills. And now I have to figure out how I am going to get the credits I need. We'll see what happens. I'm sure it'll all turn out to be fine, today was just a very heavy dose of reality and I didn't do anything fun to wipe away the negativity it left me with.

Good Lines...

2006-10-23T16:42:00.000+02:00

One of the best lines ever in a song--

"I dreamed of all the different ways I had to make her glow..."

Das Konzentrationslager

2006-10-22T21:00:00.000+02:00

Here are a few photos from my visit to Dachau, a concentration camp near Munich. I could only stomach to take these few--I wasn't in the mood to take photos of the more grizzly places there.

This was the living quarters for the people kept captive here.

That was the main bunker/administrative building. Behind it was the "prison" within the concentration camp.

This area symbolizes all of the other living quarters that were in the camp. They knocked them down and left these stone areas as a memorial.

You can see a watchtower in the distance.

Here are a few photos from my visit to Dachau, a concentration camp near Munich. I could only stomach to take these few--I wasn't in the mood to take photos of the more grizzly places there.

Random Shower Thought

2006-10-22T13:58:00.000+02:00

From time to time I feel like I am sacrificing a certain amount of academic growth by being in Germany because I am simply not going to be learning as much theoretical background about politics as I would be back in the United States.

Case in point, I was thinking about education reform and political systems while I was showering this morning and asked myself what a hypothetical system of government would look like that was as minimalist as possible in constraining the rights of individuals but also protected as many rights as deemed essential. This is essentially the work of a lot of recent political philosophy and a question I loved to think about last year, and often discussed with friends. Here I don't really get to discuss it and it is a discussion I miss because I feel like I am falling behind on the formation of my opinion on the subject.

I quickly consoled myself that I will at least get to engage this topic somewhat in the form of my research into German school reform at the K-12 level. The government's role in education is something that has fascinated me ever since graduation from high school and something I am considering writing my thesis on. More specifically engaging the politics of school reform in different nation states and how governments will have to prepare for increased foreign competition and the new "knowledge based" economy.

But I'll stil miss those discussions about the role of government in every other facet of life and the interesting challenges/opinions it always brought out.

Schoenes Wochenende

2006-10-21T17:16:00.000+02:00

21. 10. 06

Gestern war ein langen Tag. Ich waechtete um 6.30 auf und fuhrt zu Uni um 7.30. Ich belegete ein Unikurs dass fangt um 8.30 an. Ich war da sehr frueh, aber kein Problem. Der Dozent war sehr nett und es gab so viele Leute, so viele Teilnehmern, es war verrueckt. Dann lernte ich der Kurs war kein Grundstudium, sondern ein oekonomisches Hauptstudium. Aber es war nicht schwer. Ich lernte, natuerlich, viele neue oekonomische Woerter und dann geht es besser und besser. Das war wirklich toll. Am Ende fuehlte ich wie der ganze Jahr wird einfach sein. Am Abend gingen wir ins indisches Restaurant und dann zueruck bei mir im meinem Zimmer. Wir sprachen bis 1 und dann ins Bett gehen. Jeff, Katherine und Alex gefaellen mir sehr viel. Sie sind gute Fruenden. Wirklich gut.

Wir waren Heute bei Dachau, der Konzentrationslaeger, und das war natuerlich ein bisschen heftig. Der Holokaust war am grausamsten und was hat im KZs passiert war ganz schrecklich. Ich fuehlte nicht so traurig als ich dachte ich wuerde. Ich weiss nicht warum, vielleicht weil ich schon so viele Holokaust sachen gesehen war. Ich koennte nur ein paar Fotos machen weil es so heftig war. Als ich da war ich errinerete mich an "Hotel Rwanda" und auch Darfur und werde ein bisschen schlimm.

Kryptonite

2006-10-20T15:40:00.000+02:00

Today I sat through my first course at the Ludwig-Maximillians University in Munich, Germany. It is a milestone accomplishment and it opened my eyes to quite a few things. Until now all of my courses had been taught by professors paid for my study abroad program to specifically teach American students for whom German is a second language. The courses were in German, but were definitely geared toward a different (lower, but fair) level of expectations. I found my first course like this difficult not because of the language barrier but because it was strictly over German grammar--something very difficult to stay excited about for a lengthy period of time.

So today I sat through Allgemeinevolkswirtschaftslehre I (from here on abbreviated as AVWL I). It is a class in microeconomics at the LMU. I come from a small university and the lecture room we sat in today is probably bigger than every single classroom at my university. It was cavernous and the professor wore a microphone. I had to sit in the front because I have to be able to read lips sometimes, or at least watch facial expressions and gestures closely to fully understand many things. So I sat up close, after arriving about 30 minutes too early (I had thought it would take me longer to find the room).

The class was interesting, but gave me quite a few scares throughout. First of all, the class is one step further along the economics ladder than I had thought and instead of being an introduction to microeconomics is something a bit more advanced. Luckily for me, prior to taking the class, I had read about half of a microeconomics textbook (in English) that was laying around my room when I moved in. So I followed the lecture okay. But at first I thought it was a master course and we were going to have to do a lot of calculus based equations (something I'm not quite ready for) and things of that nature, but luckily I believe we will stick with algebra based math for this class.

Halfway through the class due to a scheduling conflict another class interrupted and began sitting down in our classroom. There was some confusion as to which class had claim to the room and after some discussion the professors figured out a solution--which luckily meant we were staying put. In the USA this would have actually slightly annoyed me, but would have been uneventful, but here, I was riveted. I had to pay attention to every detail, who was leaving, who was coming in, what people were saying, the reactions of students in both classes because I knew I might miss the announcement that said we were switching rooms. Or worse, I definitely wouldn't have known the name of our new room because it is very difficult from time to time to distinguish names in German for me and I would have confused it with a vocabulary word I didn't know. But, everything was okay and class continued as normal.

The professor used a case study from General Motors and had to explain to the class how cars are bought and sold in the United States. I found this really interesting because it obviously means it is done somewhat differently in Germany (I believe the manufacturers sell the cars directly themselves, without dealers). This was a cultural difference I understood and I also understood most of the example which was incredibly encouraging.

Now, how was the class academically for me? I have been thinking about this ever since class finished because I can drop the class at any time and when class finished I immediately considered dropping it (it is at 8:00AM on a Friday, not terribly easy, and I didn't know anyone in the room today which was a very lonely feeling). But as I thought about it on the subway I realized two things: 1) I understood about 80% of the concepts taught today and about 50% of the German and 2) It wasn't boring. I continued down this train of thought and began to realize how much I have taken for granted in my academic career so far.

While I was sitting in class today I found myself always two steps behing the lecture. I got what was being taught, but always after the other students. It wasn't that the concept was too hard (all we are doing is really basic price elasticity equations) but rather that I was trying to figure out what German words corresponded with what concepts and how that all fit together. About halfway through the class I had learned the German words for "marginal benefit, marginal cost, production, quantity, supply, demand...) and now that I have those words in my head the next class will be easier. I'm playing catch up. In the US I usually found myself thinking ahead of the lecture, guessing what concept would come next and predicting where the lecture would go. I can't begin to do that in Germany, not yet. But, that doesn't mean I can't succeed in the class, only that I will have to work a little harder.

This brought me to my next point. I see this class actually as an opportunity for me to teach myself some diligence with studying and working hard. Whereas before I could succeed without applying my full abilities and working to my maximum potential (unless I took on so many responsiblities I had to learn how to efficiently do the work for each) now I will have to see what it is like to work really hard at a subject in order to actually learn the material. I will see what it is like to really struggle with concepts and ideas. Sure, from time to time in the past few years I have struggled coming up with a thesis for a paper, or articulating an argument, but never with a whole course. It will be a new experience and a challenge I hope I can meet.

As I came home I was feeling more optimistic about the course and I saw that we have all of the class lecture notes online, all of the practice problems online, and even more examples provided online. There are no grades for homework, only a final and there are examples of past finals available online. All of this made me think that I can easily supplement what I don't understand in the lecture with a little elbow-grease back in my room. And in the process I will learn some microeconomics, a whole new and important set of German vocabulary, and hopefully meet some new people.

I have said it many times and I'll say it again--everything is a little (and sometims a lot) harder in German than in English. I feel so confident about the things I can accomplish in English and now I am only beginning to see what I have taken for granted (academic success, strong English skills, comfort with my native language, etc.). I believe firmly that I can only come away from this experience stronger, harder working, and more aware than I have been at any other point in my life. While I am here I will have to work harder, think more, prepare more, study more and learn more than I have ever had to before. And I'll meet the challenge it provides. I am sure of that--it just won't be quite the walk in the park I was expecting.

Uni fangt an und andere Sachen

2006-10-19T22:09:00.000+02:00

Heute war etwas ganz anders. Ich haette so viel zu tun und war beschaeftigt den ganzen Tag. Alles auf Deutsch. Der ganzen Tag sprach ich Deutsch, dachte ich auf Deutsch, und fuehlte ich ein bisschen auf Deutsch auch. Eine Anekdote: Ich rief den Volkswirtschaftslehresekretaer heute an, weil ich musste wie ich kann meine Mikrooekonomiekurs belegen wissen. Eine Frau wurde von mir gesprochen (a lame attempt at the German passive and probably makes no sense, man kann nur probieren!) aber sie war total unfreundlich. Mein Deutsch war ganz schlecht, ich glaube, weil ich sehr nervoes war. Ich sagte etwas und sie frachte mich "meinst du das..." und ich antwortete und so weiter... Schliesslich lernte ich das ich muss nur im Unterricht gehen und ein Klausur am ende des Semesters schreiben. Kein Problem! Ganz toll! Ohne Englisch.

Ich kaufte auch eine Fahrkarte fuer Bonn heute. Ich werde naechste Wochenende nach Bonn fuer ein Konferenz des DAADs fahren. Ich weiss nicht was ich soll denken. Ich muss Mikrooekonomie fehlen und das gefaellt mir nicht. DAAD sagte der Konferenz ganz wichtig ist, also ich muss teilnehmen.

Jetzt muss ich sehr frueh ins Bett gehen weil ich muss Morgen sehr frueh aufwachen. Freitags sind meine schlechtestens Tags. Trauerig.

Gluecklich Sein

2006-10-18T22:12:00.000+02:00

Heute geht es mir gut. Ich weiss nicht genau warum weil ich noch Probleme mit Liebe und andere Sachen habe, aber na ja, ich bin gluecklich. Mein Deutsch geht ganz besser und meine Kurse sind sehr interessant. Ich habe viel zu tun und das ist wirklich toll. Ich war mich ein bisschen gelangweilt letzte Wochenende. Aber jetzt muss ich mit Freunden treffen, Deutsche Zeitung lesen, kochen, einkaufen, Film schauen, usw.

Meine Stimmung ist ganz optimistisch und ich fuehle im Deutschland bequem. Ich habe mit echte deutsche Leute heute gesprochen und das war nicht so furchterregend als befor. Es geht immer einfacher. Jetzt, aber, muss ich ins Bett gehen. Ich bin sehr muede weil ich ein Film ueber Fussball ins Kino sah.

Romantic

2006-10-17T16:44:00.000+02:00

I'm a romantic. Ever since I can remember I used to make up stories about strangers I would see. I wouldn't make up just any story though, I'd try to make these interesting (but realistic and believable) stories of everyday heroes struggling to deal with reality. Naturally as I've grown older the stories have become a lot more elaborate, and I don't claim some, most or even perhaps any of them are that original. But the point is I like to dream (and sometimes I believe) that everyone leads a fabulously interesting life if you look close enough, if they let you in.

The interesting thing is that my romanticism is magnified in a foreign country whereas I was almost sure it would be suppressed. I thought: foreign language, culture and customs--how can I possibly pretend to understand what sort of made up troubles people in Germany could have? But, I think just the opposite has occurred. I have become even more of a romantic--in part due to the realization that Germans, and Europeans in general, are a lot like Americans in enough respects that matter that it isn't too hard to invent backstories for them.

The subway is the worst. All of those people sitting there silently with a thousand different, but exactly the same, blank expressions on their faces. Every single face holding a story, and I sit there and enjoy every second of the subway ride as I dutifully invent characters and stories about them that seem to explain the most trival things about these people. Today I saw a very dignified old woman and decided she had to have been a widower who proudly raised three children without her husband and through great financial adversity. Now she was enjoying the fruits of old age by indulging herself in nice clothes, nice jewelry and a nice haircut because the children were quite okay on their own. No idea if any of it was even close to fact, but when I am not being introspective I compulsively invent stories like this to keep my mind busy and to remind me not to be so hard on other people. It is my way of empathizing with the whole population and forgiving people for all the things they do for reasons I never understand.

Perhaps what makes it worse in Germany is that the German people have suffered in ways Americans could never comprehend. It is easy to think, since we were the victors in WWII, that the German people got what they deserved. It's wrong, but its easy to think. It is hard to look out at all these faces on the subway and picture in my head that probably one out of four of them (I'm pulling this number from thin air almost) has someone in their family that died in WWII. More of them had their family homes completely destroyed, had to flee the armies of the Allies, the Soviets or the Germans themselves. Now that was quite awhile in the past and my generation is certainly not going to dwell on these things too much, but the older people surely remember, and it surely affects the national conscience/mindset all the way to today. The Germans are proud and ashamed all at once--and have every reason to be. It's probably the single most interesting thing to me about German national identity and a big reason I'd like to get to know more Germans. The whole thing is something we cannot fathom in America. And this is probably another good example of me romanticizing something, but if you think about it, there is definitely something there.

The other strange and semi-related thought I had today is how much and how little you can tell about someone based on their outside appearance. What you can tell is what people want to say to you with their outward appearance i.e. "I don't care." or "I'm hardcore." or "I work out a lot." but what you can't tell is why they want to say that. People almost always get the first message right when they meet someone, but they don't always realize there is another message underneath that is much more important--the intent of the first. The girl that wears "provocative" clothing could be doing it because she really sincerely believes that will bring her the kind of guy she wants, or she could be doing it to rebel against her parents, or she could be doing it because she thinks she looks good, or of course, out of peer pressure. Those reasons all mean that the person wearing the exact same outfit could be several different people. This line of thinking fascinated me and it is something I'll probably think about more because I think it is something we often intuit but can't always articulate.

Anyway, enough random subway induced thoughts---time for Abendessen!

Paris Pictures Part 2

2006-10-14T20:25:00.000+02:00

More Paris photos...

The obligatory Eiffel Tower shot.

A view from the top. Hazy and massive--that's Paris.

The Musee d' Orsay-- a giant museuem of early modern art. A beautiful building. The boat trip was really cool.

Notre Dame from the back and on the Seine.

Underneath Notre Dame, the remanants of the old city walls of Paris. Pretty cool.

Foreign Feeling

2006-10-13T14:33:00.000+02:00

Two separate observations about being an American student abroad.

Being on another continent brings out the best in most people in ways that are hard to explain. Whenever I meet other Americans while I am abroad they are almost always more generous, more friendly, more interesting to talk to, and more willing to help other people out than back in the USA. This makes me think that Americans hold some bond as a people, as a national identity, (a point some people here have disagreed with me on) that binds them together and makes them willing to help their fellow countrymen out. Case in point, we met up with another American student who was a friend of a friend in Paris and he stayed with us for a night in our apartment. He was incredibly helpful, polite and grateful and offered several times to put us up in Florence if we ever wanted to visit Italy. I would normally have not been thrilled with putting a practical stranger up for the night, but I was actually glad to help another traveler out and explore Paris a bit with another American. It is as if being here is a common "struggle" and we are just more willing to help each other out because if we don't we won't get the most out of it. And the willingness of this guy to reciprocrate with us and let us stay with him is very typical of what I have experienced so far meeting Americans outside of my program abroad. I really love this aspect of being abroad because it makes me feel very American and it makes me really love my country more because I see the best side of America.

The other observation I had is how being immersed in a culture where I don't know any of the dominant language (as in Norway, Czech Republic and France) or very little (as in Germany) has changed the way I think about things in many subtle ways. I am much more willing to ask for help than I have ever been before in my life, because the fact of the matter is I often need help. A good example is when we were in Paris and did not know how to get into our apartment building (we couldn't figure out the buzzer) we had to wait for someone to exit and ask them for help. This is something I would have been incredibly reluctant to do, but more and more I am becoming okay with asking for help, directions, or advice. And of course, asking people if they speak German or English. I don't view asking for help as a sign of weakness anymore, and while I am still reluctant to over-ask for help, I find it silly that I have always been so reluctant to ask for assistance.

I also find myself thinking about how passively I have pursued the goals and activities I enjoy. In college I so far have found myself just waiting for opportunities and then jumping on them, but not creating my own opportunities by asking about the things I really want to do. I am starting to get a better idea of what those things are academically, recreationally and socially--and now I am starting to think of ways to try to pursue them more directly instead of waiting for them to fall into my lap. I have grown up a lot in the last two months just in how I think about what I will pursue, where my life is going, and where I want it to end up. I don't have it all figured out by any stretch, but I do feel like I am much better equipped with the tools to make get it going in whatever direction I choose.

Finally, I think my communication skills have already improved quite a bit. I have to work so much harder to get a point across in German and people have to be patient with me that I have found myself realizing I never have considered my audience when communicating with other people as much as I should have. Moreover, often I find myself speaking to non-native English speakers here in English (in Prague this happened a lot for example) and you have to gauge how to speak based on a guess about the recipient's English abilities. This is fascinating to me, and something I always enjoy doing because I just find foreign language skills fascinating and am always impressed at how well people speak English (and usually very thankful for this as well). My German is coming along, but abroad from Germany it isn't usually very helpful except when I feel like pretending I am a German and not an American (something we did a little in France).

In general I just feel more confident that I can live the life I want and that the things I want are well within reach. I feel like I have grown up so much in a couple of months already and I feel like by the time I come back to the States I will be ready to conquer the world. That alone is worth all of the trouble going here has been--and I get fluency in a foreign language, a lifetime worth of travel memories, and meeting lots of cool new people thrown in as a bonus.

Artsy Paris Photos

2006-10-13T01:00:00.000+02:00

These photos don't exactly show you what Paris looks like, I just thought they looked kind of cool. I hope you agree.

This is the column Napoleon erected in honor of the French Revolution and Bastille Day on the sight of the former Bastille. It isn't lit up at night so I had to take this long exposure shot. It turned out kind of cool.

Peering Over the Fence at Notre Dame

The Foundations. This is the excavation project going on under the Louvre. My friend Alex took this with his camera which was a lot better with LT photos than mine.

The Locals. These two French guys jumped in front of my camera during a LT shot of the Arc de Triumph. The picture turned out pretty cool, and they insisted on being in it by shaking their heads at me when I went to delete it.

Somber. This is the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in France and it is under the Arc de Triumph. I am partial to this photo because I had to run across traffic to the Arc to get the photo and then run back because the underground walkways were sealed of late at night. It was a lot of fun.

Car Show Photos

2006-10-13T00:04:00.000+02:00

Here are some photos of the highlights (for me) from the Paris International Auto Show, the biggest car show in Europe this year.

This looks like a glorified golf cart, but it is really cute. It made me think of my little sister. It's a little car called a Zesta.

A sweet LeMans style race car. I can't remember if this will actually get run in LeMans or not, but it sure looked cool.

This is the Maserati I really liked. It is so pretty.

I wouldn't mind this one either, a McClaren Mercedes SLK (or SLR I can't remember). This is a $600,000 super car that easily does 250 mph getting over 700 horsepower out of a supercharged V-8. Amazing.

This picture isn't the best, but that car is definitely sequined. You can only wonder... why?

Paris Thoughts Part 2

2006-10-11T23:45:00.000+02:00

Today I saw the Louvre (www.louvre.fr) Notre Dame, Saint Chappelle, and took a river cruise down the Seine. I also took a peak at the Pompidou Art Museum as well. Here are a few scattered thoughts:

The Pompidou looked like an industrial nightmare painted in 70’s colors, it was cool
The Louvre was ridiculously huge, at least three city blocks long
The inside of the Louvre was equally if not more beautiful than all of the amazing paintings on the wall. The building was too big to see in a single day.
Notre Dame was not as big as I expected, but it was beautiful.
Equally beautiful as the Cathedral was the garden in the back.
Inside Notre Dame is incredibly dark and it is hard to see things, but the inside is cavernous.
The amount of detail on the sculptures outside Notre Dame and the Louvre was mind blowing, I wish I took more photos.
Saint Chappelle was really underwhelming and not worth the wait, but the stained glass windows with the entire Bible depicted in pictures were really cool.
The river cruise was a blast because so much of the cool architecture is along the Seine, a really dirty river, but with amazing buildings on every side.
More on the Louvre: every corner you turned you would find something famous and mind blowing (Nike, Venus de Milo, Hammarabi’s Code, a Sphinx, Mona Lisa, King Louis XIV’s crown).
I don’t like art but I found the art inside the Louvre to just be amazing. Overwhelming.
Arc de Triumph was really fun at night. We ran across to the middle through this giant traffic circle, and took really fun pictures with the Arc. It is much bigger than I expected.
The Eiffel Tower is lit up like a Christmas tree at night.
The Bastille monument is less exciting than I expected it to be, but the new Opera house there is amazing.

General remarks about the trip. Our apartment was amazing, remember to use Craigs list to find places to stay in foreign cities. It worked out really well. I also had a lot of fun with Jeff, Katherine, Alex and Rebecca cooking every night, tossing back some incredibly cheap (and sometimes great, sometimes terrible) French wine, and then walking around Paris buying pastries (Crepes are amazing, cinnamon and sugar is where it is at), and seeing how hopping Paris is at night. It is so much different than a German city because there are still people walking the streets at 11 or 12 on a weeknight.

French sounds really funny. And not as romantic as I had thought. It sounds completely different than even German did to me. Maybe I am just used to Paris. Speaking of German I feel a lot better about my German after traveling in Paris and trying to figure out how to say anything in French—even simple things. I can at least handle those in German.

Paris Thoughts Part 1

2006-10-10T21:22:00.000+02:00

Paris. Paris is a giant city. Remarkably gigantic. The size of the city is hard to picture. And it is dirty. Dirtier than I thought, the floor of the subways is dirty and sticky. The sidewalks are pretty dirty with garbage and cigarette butts, and the air feels dirty as well. Despite all of this Paris remains a beautiful city. The architecture is unreal, not at all like Germany, though it does remind me a bit of Prague. The city feels much older than any city in Germany—most likely because despite all of the wars the French have fought the city has remained largely untouched by the scars of war. There are so many historical buildings that it will be impossible to see them all in only two days. I am a little disappointed about this, but hopefully I will be able to return.

I have been surprised by how tall the buildings all are, way taller than I found Berlin to be, and how many people there are (the subways are incredibly crowded). The people seem friendly enough—the French people I asked for help all spoke passing English and didn’t seem so inconvenienced or rude as I had imagined. I also attempted to speak mostly German and asked if the other person spoke German first to try to give the appearance of being a German. I don’t know how successful I was, but a couple of times I was asked if I was German. Only because the other person spoke no German at all, I am sure.

The subway is a lot cheaper than I expected, but food and everything else is much more expensive. I think the French transit system is really different than the German, but still efficient, and cheaper. The German system seems more logical in the way it is laid out while the French system seems to be the product of additions of necessity over the years. Fare control and security on the French trains is much tighter than in Germany though.

The Eiffel Tower was much different than I expected. It is gigantic, just like Paris, much bigger than I had ever imagined. Three hundred meters is a lot taller than I thought, and it is a lot wider too. I don’t know where my perceptions of the Eiffel Tower came from, but they were all wrong. It was not filthy at the bottom or crowded like I had expected. There were a lot of people but it was clean, and very beautiful at the bottom (I think it would look amazing in the snow, but only if the snow didn’t turn brown from city dirt). The view from the observation deck on the 2^nd level was amazing as well. It was too crowded for us to go to the top, which was a huge disappointment, but from the 2^nd level (nearly 120 meters up) you could see just how vast Paris is. The river cuts the city into a northern and southern half. There are buildings as far as the eye can see in every direction and so many five, six or ten story apartment complexes it seems as if the ground actually begins at ten stories up.

For some reason—probably the obvious romantic cliché, I thought of Kelly as I stood on top of the Eiffel Tower and I thought how everything is less enjoyable without her. A depressing thought. Then I looked west and just thought that halfway around the world she was doing something else, sleeping, and not with me. I have felt so far from her lately and I have started to become gripped by this fear that we are drifting apart irreparably. I don’t want that to happen and I will do everything I can to stop it, but sometimes I wonder how strong we both are—strong enough to keep it together? Other people have been through this same ordeal and it is impossible to say how it turns out—all I know for now is that I miss her terribly every day, I dream about her more and more at night, and I think about her visit in Thanksgiving and use it as bright spot of hope that things are going to be okay.

We also went to the European Auto Show today and it was quite an experience. Tons and tons and tons of nice cars that I didn’t know anything about. I will just plop down a few highlights so I can remember to look more into them later:

Maseratis—my personal favorite Italian car, way underrated I think, and gorgeous
Dodge Vipers—Kelly’s favorite car, it reminded me of her, made me happy
The new Corvette—a gorgeous piece of engineering and worthy of the Vette moniker
VW Phateon—perhaps my pick for coolest luxury sedan, it had a slew of awesome features including an optional W-12 engine, Adaptable Cruise Control, Accident Minimization (shuts down fuel pumps, disconnects the battery, etc) and tons of other cool features
Bentley’s, Aston Martins and Rolls-Royce’s—the RRs were a lot boxier than I thought, and I didn’t get to see much of them due to the crowds, the Bentley’s were wicked
I was disappointed by the Lamborghinis, they just weren’t as sexy as I expected, they looked too concept car-ish
Ferraris were beautiful—and expensive
The Mercedes McClaren SLR super car, it looked like a bullet on wheels with attitude
Weird new Chinese cars
Lots of engine design information, turbocharger info and transmission design information as well—8 speed automatics are on the horizon
Reading about the VW CCS combustion system—a new fuel injection/ignition system
LeMans and Formula 1 race cars—so short, so fast, so cool looking
Rally cars

Berlin Photos Part 1

2006-10-08T19:58:00.000+02:00

I just concluded a five day, super intensive sight seeing trip to Berlin in which I took over 250 photos. Here are five that could not possibly capture everything I saw:

Soviet architecture by night, this is the so called "Fernsehturm" built by the Soviets in East Berlin. I went up it at night (photos from that to come later). It is 375 meters tall. It looks downright ghostly in this picture.

This is the Pergamon Museum named after the temple the Germans took from Italy (or Greece, I forget) and rebuilt in Germany. This is the outside of the massive building.

This is the view upward from inside the Holocaust Memorial in Berlin. This was one of the most amazing things we saw in Berlin and one of the most fun things we did while we were there. It felt really somber--I was impressed.

This is my good friend Katherine taking a look at a corner of the Reichstag--the place where the German Parliament sits.

There's me in front of a segment of the Berlin Wall. I like this segment better than the East Side Gallery because you can see just how strong the wall is (steel-reinforced concrete). And I'm in the picture naturally to show you how hard it would be to jump that thing.

Twenty Eight Reasons to Love Pearl Jam (Part 1)

2006-10-02T19:38:00.000+02:00

This is my review of the amazing Pearl Jam concert I attended on September 22nd, 2006 at the Sazka Arena in Praha, Czech Republic (Prague). To get to the concert was an amazing feat for me and my good friend Malte. There were problems with my passport, traffic jams on the drive to Prague jeopardizing our chances to pick up the tickets, and getting lost in Prague both on foot, and when trying to figure out the mass transit system. We survived it all and sitting in those two seats, halfway up in Sazka Arena gazing down on the stage waiting for Pearl Jam brought a feeling of great satisfaction. Then astonishment--as the show began:

Track 1: MFC

My bet for the opener was "Save You" but Pearl Jam kicked it off with a song I mistakenly identified at first as "Rearviewmirror" (a mistake I always make). The show was loud, but not painfully loud, and the acoustics were good, but not great. The opening band had left me worried, but apparently their sound crew wasn't quite as talented as that for PJ at squeezing the best sound out of the echoey and cavernous hockey arena. The guitar solos sounded a little blurry to me at first, and the vocals seemed too low at first, but as the show went on these things improved. The band was really fired up with Mike McCready going to town on the guitar solo--and the band kicked right into the next song with some really inspired drumming.

Track 2: Last Exit

Not a favorite track of mine by any stretch, I usually skip it on the album "Riot Act". It was fun to hear live though with the way the vocals echoed throughout the arena and the way the guitar and bass just hit you--you couldn't help but move your feet. The end of the song was really great with the way the band ended exactly together and left nothing but silence. At this point I knew the concert was going to be great--because the band's timing was dead on.

Track 3: Animal

Now the mix sounds great, the guitars are really shining through, the bass is making me move my feet, and the vocals are clear. The crowd is singing along and it sounds like a choir at the more emotional points in the song which really made it just that much more powerful. I couldn't help jumping up and down because this song already has such a great beat and live it was just infectious. The guitar solos weren't exactly like those on the album, they were different, and that was great because they seemed fresh, and much more difficult--and that really matters to me.

Track 4: Life Wasted

The first track to get played off the new album at the show--something I wasn't looking forward to. I found a lot of the new album to be good, but not great. There didn't seem to be any of those killer, must have Pearl Jam tracks on the new album to me, except the song "Come Back". But live these songs took on a whole new life to me. This song in particular was always a decent rock song to me, but nothing amazing. But live it sounded bigger, louder, harder and much more meaningful. I actually listened to the lyrics and found them much more interesting than the first time I listened to the song on the album. Maybe the album just restricted some of the energy that came through live--all I know is that I really enjoy the live cut of this song a lot. It sounds like a big rock song should, especially because the guitar work is a lot more fluid, improvised, and really cool sounding.

Track 5: Small Town

Before the song, Eddie Vedder addresses the crowd in Czech--which was a bit disappointing because I don't speak a word of Czech, but at the same time a really touching gesture to the Czech Republic. It was a big hit with the Czech fans. This is the first song that I know all the words too (though Animal is close). This is less of a hard rocker than the previous four, and it is a good pick to help bring the crowd down gently to get to some of PJs really good ballads, etc. This song was a big PJ hit so a lot of the audience sang a lot of the lines with this one and that really helped open it up and make it sound new. When the rest of the band kicks in with Stone Gossard and Eddie Vedder I started singing along too, something I assured myself I wouldn't do. I couldn't help it--such a great song. Best moment from the song is when the entire crowd sang along with the line "I just want to scream, HELLO!"

Track 6: World Wide Suicide

The last song ended with the band really energetic, but I thought they would slow it down and hit us with a slow song. Instead the picked us back up with another rocker off of the new album, the first single, World Wide Suicide. Definitely not a fan of this song at all, and thought it was an odd pick for a single, but now I think it probably was a good pick. The song really comes alive in concert, it doesn't sound as bound up as it does on the album, and it is a song people can get up and move to. I also think it kind of captures the theme of the album really well--an anti-war protest for the most part--without being too preachy or too moody. It is just a great rock song--which doesn't make it a favorite of mine, but hearing it live was definitely quite amazing. The band stuck pretty close to the album version of this song, and it was hard to hear some of the guitar details due to the mix, but the vocals were loud, emotional and Vedder was really fun to watch on stage singing this one.

Track 7: Insignificance

Usually a song I skipped on probably my least favorite PJ album (Binaural) this is definitely not a track I will skip next time I listen to that album. The cool part about this song is that I thought (and I'm not entirely sure now that I have the recording that this is true) that Eddie Vedder sang "Let the silence protest..." and then the band stopped and the crowd kind of cheered while there was a long rest for the entire bnad before the kicked back into the song and finished. It is another anti-war anthem, and I thought that was a really classy way to get that message to the audience, but now I think the line might actually have been "Let the song protest..." and so I guess it just isn't as cool. I'll just believe the first--but either way the song was really great as it built to a big crescendo at the end, which makes you feel like the whole song is an amusement park ride. I enjoyed it.

Track 8: Marker in the Sand

Another track off of the new album. One of the better tracks off of the new album, I really enjoy the chorus, and live the chorus was even better. At this point in the concert I think I realized that Pearl Jam, and Eddie Vedder's vocals in particular, were destined to play in arenas. They seemed to fill up the arena better than any other band I have ever seen in concert. It seemed to make this song so much better, just like with all the others. Pretty cool.

Track 9: Unemployable

This is one of my favorites off of the new album. It wasn't as good live as on the album I think. It was hard to hear a lot of the subtle touches that made me really like it from the album (some of the lead guitar work, and backing vocals). Vedder's vocals were tough to understand in some of the verses for me, where we were sitting, and while the chorus was great I usually enjoy the verses a lot and was disappointed they were hard to understand. I still sung along of course. The breakdown halfway through the song was really good, and the band had seemed a bit out of sync for the first half of the song, but seemed to get back on track after the breakdown. Then the song seemed to take off--but the lead guitar was still tough to distinguish (the opening act had a lot of problems with this too). Sazka Arena was a giant echoey ice hockey arena, so I definitely give the PJ sound crew credit for making it sound as good as they did.

Track 10: You Are

The last track ended on a slower note, and then this song slowed things way down. This song has a really great guitar riff, but it is incredibly slow and I sat down finally during this song. The really cool part is that occasionally in the song there are stops where the whole band rests and lets the sound die out of the stadium, and then kicks right back in for the next part of the song--and those sounded really cool in that big stadium. This song really slowed the show down, so I wasn't sure what to expect next.

Track 11: Sad

One of my favorite PJ songs of all time--with tons of memories associated with it. I was thrilled when the band kicked into this song because it is a great rock song and when the bass and drums would kick in and out you could feel it in your chest everytime they pounded into the song. The lighting on this song I remember was particularly well done (though the whole show was done really well I think). The only disappointed (thankfully this doesn't carry through to the bootleg I bought) is that the lead guitar work on this song was incredibly hard to hear. McCready's guitar was set to sound pretty thick and didn't cut through the mix as well as if the treble had been much higher. The bass, drums, and rhythm guitars buried the wicked guitar solo that usually ends this song--but on the recording I can hear it perfectly and enjoy it a lot because it sounds great with the guitar thicker. It was just hard to distinguish live from where we were sitting. I was a little confused about this because on the album it is not thick at all, it is incredibly trebeled out and very distinguishable--and this made me think perhaps someone on the crew had made a mistake. A question I will never get answered... c'est la vie.

Track 12: Whipping

The only song the band played that I actually actively dislike. Once again, live made the song much better. I enjoyed it, it really kept the energy up in the stadium after Sad had woke us up out of the lull that "You Are" had induced. The chorus of this song still was not that great--even life--I'm just not a fan of one word chorus's "the whipping... the whipping..."

Track 13: Even Flow

It is hard to pick a favorite song from the concert, but this rendition of Even Flow is easily up there. The band has done a lot with the song since they originally recorded it over 15 years ago. The main guitar riff has gotten tighter and funkier. I thought this was actually really fun, it made the song more fun to move to and the riff at the end of every verse was even more impressive contrasted with this new main guitar riff. But, the highlight of this song was the guitar duel and drum solo that followed the lyrics. The band broke down into a giant jam session for about 2 1/2 minutes in the last 1/4 of the song and this was absolutely mind blowing. Both guitars blasted through the mix and McCready and Gossard exchanged in a little dueling guitars and some call and answer--that was a lot of fun to watch them on stage just smiling and having a great time. The drum solo was fun too--not something you hear every day and the drums sounded great in the stadium. The vocals were top shelf and Vedder kept the crowd entertained running around on stage during the solo, taking a break to drink some wine, and coming back just barely in time to hit the last few lines of the song (this added a little drama as we watched and made the show way fun as Vedder sprinted to the mic to get out the last few lyrics).

Track 14: Daughter

One of the most successful Pearl Jam songs and one of my favorites as well--this one was great because the whole audience new the words and sang along the whole time. The band sounded amazing--the mix was perfect on this song, everything came through clearly and sounded even better than on the album (the breakdown part after the first verse just sounded so much cleaner and more subtle than it does, even on the album). The guitar was of course amazing. At the end of the song there was an extended vocal improv with the audience and Vedder playing call and answer that was kind of cool, and didn't last so long that the novelty wore off. The band did a good job interacting with the crowd in just the right amount for the entire show. That was really classy I thought.

Track 15: Alone

A rare track--from the B-Side compliation--and a great song. This is a really emotional song, and really great loud. There are lots of parts where the band stops and the vocals go on, and these sounded great as the arena left the band hanging in the air and fading out while the vocals came over top of them. I really liked that effect. The main guitar riff was really funky with plenty of wah-wah and I found that a lot of fun to listen to in the big stadium. A great rock song and a good surprise to hear something a little different.

Track 16: Jeremy

Absolutely a stunning song live. On the album it is of course a solid rock song, but once again live in the stadium I found it amazing. The whole audience knew this one and sang along and it was great. I feel like a broken record--great guitar work, great vocals. Ament looked like he was having fun with the bass part too. He was jumping all over stage the whole concert though, really fun to watch.

Track 17: Do the Evolution

Not that fun of a song to listen to the album, somehow live it filters out all of the more experimental/clashing sounds that clutter up the recorded version. The lyrics are fun, and though a lot of it is screamed (which I usually don't like) it was fun to hear it here. The crowd was really into it, watching the crowd in the pit swaying to this song was like watching the waves move on the ocean. I was more than a little glad to be sitting in the stands for this part of the show. At the end of this song the band went backstage after saying thanks to the crowd. It was obvious they would be back, but I remember thinking after this song "Wow, have we really been here that long?" and when I looked at my watch it was as if over an hour had just slid right past in a few seconds.

A few interesting random things I noticed at the show--lots of international fans. A bunch of people (hundreds) from Poland because the tour didn't go through Poland. They brought tons of flags, and a giant sign that said "You Forgot Poland" (something they also chanted early in the set during a pause between songs). The people next to us had tour shirts from several other European tours and were obviously long-time Pearl Jam fans (much longer than me) as one guy stood and watched the show almost emotionless, with a very critical look at the bands every move. He seemed to enjoy a few things though, so that was good. Crazy Czech girl next to us flailing all over the place to a lot of the songs and singing along. She got pretty close to my friend quite a few times which provided some humor (for me at least). And finally in front of us we witnessed the rare event where a woman buys a man she just meets a drink. It was, for a moment, as if the world had turned upside down. I don't know what became of it, but I was entertained to see it happen.

A Few Small Differences

2006-10-02T19:25:00.000+02:00

Yesterday I was talking to my little sister on the phone and trying to come up with a list of the few small things that are different between Europe and the United States that you notice, but then quickly forget about. Here is some of the things I came up with so far:

* Forget about really cold drinks. Colder than room temperature is easy enough to find, but ice cold drinks are a rarity--and I'm already quite content with having my Coke lukewarm.

* Alcohol sold everywhere. Every restaurant, movie theaters, everything. Good, bad, or indifferent it all depends on your perspective--but it is there.

* Paying to use public restrooms. Not always, but definitely sometimes.

* Paying a 1 Euro deposit to use everything from shopping carts to lockers to store your stuff at museums. You almost always get the Euro back when you return the cart or the key to the locker--but a 1 Euro coin is your best friend.

* Paying a 15 Euro cent "Pfand" or deposit on all bottles (plastic and glass) and a few other items--and then getting that "Pfand" back when you return the bottles to the store.

* Senior women (over 55) who dye their hair with hot pink, purple, red or other "flashy" colors.

* Seating yourself at restaurants.

* Paying extra for water, ketchup, and other small items in a restaurant.

* Nudity. There is lots more nudity from ads with topless girls in regular newspapers to nude beaches in the middle of otherwise normal parks.

* Closed doors. German students keep their doors closed in their dorm--which doesn't mean they want privacy--unlike American students who usually keep their doors open a lot more often.

That is enough for now. I am sure as I get more settled I'll learn many more cultural differences--but these are just some preliminary observations I wanted to put down before I become so used to them I forget about their significance.

Pearl Jam Concert Photo

2006-10-02T13:56:00.000+02:00

A small teaser for the post I am going to write reviewing the concert I attended:

There is Eddie Vedder and Stone Gossard rocking out.

Here is Eddie Vedder at the beginning of the song "Bu$hleaguer" a very anti-Bush anthem. This was quite an entertaining part of the show with Vedder dancing the robot, and doing other goofy things while wearing this President Bush mask. Next to him is Mike McCready, the amazingly talented lead guitarist.

Placeholder

2006-10-02T13:42:00.000+02:00

I have a lot more to post about, but for now, a few photos from the Munich Zoo.

Living the dream. A big hunk of meat and a place to sleep. Maybe the cage is a little small, but he had a big old yard to play in and decided to sleep right where we could get this close to him. Pretty cool.

This little grasshopper was just showing off. Pretty cool.

I want one of these guys so much. They are so cool. When I have a house I am going to buy a tortoise like this. They are just too cool.

Breakthrough or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love My Abschlussprufueng

2006-09-28T21:47:00.000+02:00

I get it. German is finally starting to make sense to me. It has been a few weeks now, a few very intense weeks, but I think I am getting the hang of it. I sat down to study for my German final tomorrow and things just started clicking like they haven't before. The mind works in mysterious and subtle ways, and I never understand how I learn things, but I realized that my vocabulary has probably already doubled or tripled since I have come here. This is amazing.

I was sitting down and staring at this set of verbs that can take either the accusative or the dative case, and I had always got them confused before. This time I looked at the exercise and just flew through it and got everything right, and laughed at what a breeze it was all of the sudden. It just clicked. I am starting to work through my thought patterns when composing German sentences much quicker.

I'll give a quick example.

Usually when I write a German sentence I have to first come up with the vocabulary I know to best approximate what I want to say in English (for a few phrases this step is entirely removed, like "I'm sorry." or "I would like..." because I use them so often, hopefully the rest becomes like this slowly as I use it more and learn more).

Next I must conjugate the verb--which is becoming more and more automatic for me (some verbs are much easier than others, but surprisingly it is the "irregular" verbs I find easier because I have now begun committing them to memory).

Now I have to properly decline all of the adjectives and nouns in the sentence and make sure they correspond to the right part of speech. A concrete example of this is the sentence: "I set the cat on the table." A fairly simple sentence in English. This is how I have to walk through it in German (I already have the subject and verb figured out).
1) the cat--this is the object being moved so it is in the accusative case. Now I have to figure out if the cat is masculine, feminine, or like in the movie Grosse Point Blank, neutral (undetermined, because I respect my cat's privacy). We'll go with feminine because it makes our job easier, feminine nouns don't change in the accusative. So now I know the sentence goes "Ich setze die Katze..."

2) on the table-- the preposition on (auf) in German can either signal the accusative or the dative case. I have already used the accusative so it is a safe bet I need the dative case here. But that is actually wrong. When motion is involved, as in this case, I must make sure to double check my verb and see that it is actually the transitive version--which is used to describe "where to" I am putting something. That means the word following the preposition (indirect object I do believe in English) is actually in the ACCUSATIVE case, even though it is describing a position, and I already have an accusative object. Since I know table "der Tisch" is masculine, I know I have to change the article (der becomes den) because it is masculine in the accusative case. So now I know the sentence goes "Ich setze die Katze auf den Tisch."

Finally I have to check my word order and make sure the subject comes first, the verb second. Now that that is done, I can finally say or write the sentence.

For me now all of these steps are becoming more and more automatic. Which verbs are accusative and dative is becoming more intuitive to me, and how to decline the nouns (change them between cases, according to gender) is starting to become much more automatic for me as well. This is a huge relief, because for awhile this was incredibly hard. It is still hard, but the fact that it is getting easier is a giant relief. We'll just have to see how the test goes.

Auf den See

2006-09-28T18:23:00.000+02:00

26.09.2006
Heute bekam ich ein wunderschoenen E-mail von Kelly. Es war so suss und jetzt ist mein Tag super schoen. Iche liebe wenn diese Sachen passiert. Jetzt bin ich an den Starnberger See in einem Schiff. Das Wetter ist schrecklich mit dem Nebel und Regen. Es ist OK weil wir frueh nach Hause zurueckgehen. Das ist gut weil heute ich nach Marktkauf, VWL Institut, und der Post gehen muss. Ich habe Geld und so habe ich viel zu tun. Das ist nicht eine Sorge, wenn ich bin beschaeftigt geht die Zeit schneller. Jedes Tag bringt mich naeher Kelly und dann fuer ein paar Tage ist sie keine Traum, aber realitaet. Manchmal hat man nur die Hoffnung--und jetzt ist das mich.

Ich freue mich an meine Unikurse. Ich belege eins von: "Spieltheorie", "Mikrooekonomie", "Statistik fuer Wirschaft" und "Arbetweise die Vereinten Nationen". Hoeffentlich kann ich zwei fertig machen-- Mikro und Spieltheorie sind am besten--aber ich muss erst zum Institut gehen, und lerne was ich muss machen und wissen fuer jeden Kurs. Das ist ein bisschen schwer aber ich kann das machen. Ich habe ein bisschen Zeit und ich will das zu tun.

Auch habe ich meine Abschluss Pruefung des Vorsemesters am Freitag. Ich habe ein bisschen Angst weil ich eine gute Note braucht. Ich finde das Vorsemester sehr schwer mit nicht so viel Zeit (besonders Freizeit) und sehr viel zu tun. Jedes Tag habe ich Hausaufgaben, Unterricht, ein Eckursion oder etwas, und dann muss ich Zeit fuer kochen, e-mail, Bank gehen, einkaufen (besonders fuer Essen) usw. finden. Nicht einfach.

Hoeffentlich wird alle in Ordnung sein. Ich glaube im Mitte November werde ich alle sehr viel besser verstehen und machen.

International Debate

2006-09-26T21:45:00.000+02:00

I often find myself playing devils advocate during our in-class discussions in German class. We are clearly outmatched in language skills by our professor, and no one really expects our discussions to be filled with enlightening revelations, but I still feel obligated to defend the other side. Today we discussed whether or not boxing is a true sport, and a sport people should be allowed to enjoy watching. I had watched the boxing match we were discussing actually (read about it here, one of the best fights of the decade I guarantee it).

I am actually a big sports fan, I love all sports, but boxing is usually pretty boring to me. But, you could not watch this fight and be bored. It was so dramatic, with one boxer holding off the other while he struggled with a broken jaw, and lost lots of blood. If he finished the fight he won, if he withdrew because of his injuries, he lost, and the cheap-shotting challenger to his title would become the new champion. Compelling stuff. Boxing usually isn't like this, but this match was.

This match was also controversial. My professor thought they should have stopped the fight because of the damage done to Arthur Abraham (the middleweight world champion) by the other fighter. We had a great discussion about whether boxing is a real sport, whether people should enjoy watching it, and who should decide when the match has to be over. I think I came off as an incredibly passionate boxing fan in German, but I tried to make my main point as clear as possible. It is just hard to be subtle in a language you are just learning, so I don't think I was well understood by my professor, but it was still fun. And it pushed the discussion longer, which was more interesting than how to decline pronouns.

My feelings on boxing are this--moreso than most other sports the entertainment value of a boxing match is entirely contingent on the skill of the boxers. Watching two skilled boxers fight is just as enjoyable as watching two skilled teams play football, basketball, soccer, or any other sport. When you watch someone who is the best at their particular athletic event--whether it is sprinting, dancing, curling or anything else--it is hard not to be in awe of that skill. For me it is not boxing that is particularly intersting, but the incredibly skill the boxers have, the subtle differences between them and two thugs fighting on the street. These fascinate me. I don't see any shame in marvelling at someone's incredibly skill at a game with defined rules. Especially when it is clear they have trained and worked hard to hone their skills. That is exactly what I saw in this boxing match on Saturday night.

But more importantly, I love arguing in German--so at least that much hasn't changed about me.

Intercultural Exchange

2006-09-26T21:26:00.000+02:00

Sometimes when you communicate with people in a language that is your own you understand what the other person is saying very well because your vocabulary is on par with theirs and they are speaking slowly and clearly enough for you to get every single word. This rarely happens. Much more likely if you understand the other person (which is by no means guaranteed) it is because of the clues you are using to fill in the many blanks in what they are saying--contextual clues, situational clues, gestures, sign language, and facial expressions.

The following is an excerpt from a situation I encountered today which I understood very well due to all of the contextual clues. I have roughly translated into English (based on my guesses) what was said. I will also include gestures where necessary:

Scene: An Automated Stamp Machine (in German, Ein Briefmarkautomat)

I stand behind a mother and her child while another man fumbles endlessly with the machine. The mother is playing peek-a-boo with her child, is quite young, and seems very nice and motherly. This is important.

The guy at the machine finishes and walks off, and I look at the mother as if to ask her if she is going to go next. She motions that she will not use the machine, and as she does this a man in a business suit (a very young man) who looks exactly like a stereotypical yuppie (I use this only for descriptive purposes) strides up to the machine and begins using it.

Woman: "Hey you. He was waiting, you should get behind him."
Man: "Not my problem."
Woman: "I think it is." (looks at me)
Me: "No problem. It's fine."
Woman: (shakes head at me in disbelief and strides toward Yuppie-man) "You should wait your turn."
Man: "Buzz off."
Woman: "You asshole." (This is exactly right, I heard and translated those words very easily)
Man: "Whatever."
Woman: "Shit..." (She smiles at me as if to apologize for not making this guy go away).
Me: "Thanks"

After the yuppie is done at the machine (he took maybe 20 seconds, which was nice) I fumbled with the machine and realized it didn't even accept Euro-bills and only accepted coins or my bank card, meaning my previous trip to the ATM was absolutely worthless. I walk off without my stamps because I will wait to buy the exact stamps I need from the store with bills tomorrow. As I walk off I thank the woman again, and she just smiles, and goes back to playing peek-a-boo with her baby.

A few things struck me about this very brief encounter. At first I thought there was some history between the man and woman judging by the speed with which the woman told him off. Even if this is not the case, I am left to wonder why the woman was so quick to jump to my defense. It was rather flattering, and put a smile on my face for most of the afternoon after that, but I have to wonder why she was so angry so quickly. This leads me to believe perhaps the man said something more offensive in German to her that I didn't understand or didn't hear, and that is what prompted her to get even more upset.

At any rate it was a really fun exchange and a little nerve-wracking all at once, but I think that is a good microcosm of what being in a foreign country is like. Even the most minute situational conversations take on a more significant meaning as you learn something from every one, and every single one is infinitely more difficult than its counterpart in your own language. You pick your words carefully, you speak slowly and deliberately, and you listen really closely to what you are told-- all things I have been known from time to time to be less than diligent about doing. I think apart from learning German, I am learning to better communicate by starting to understand all of the subtleties that go into communication even better than before. I really find that utterly fascinating every single day.

More Photos from Prague

2006-09-25T22:57:00.000+02:00

These are just some sights in Prague you can't miss.

I don't remember what building this is, or where it is, and I think what is most remarkable to me is how picturesque it is without being a particularly important building in Prague. (At least I think it isn't particularly important.)

The inside of a Soviet-era train station at night. I just really like the lighting in this photo and I really like the Soviet era architechture. It was just really cool to see Cold War relics.

This is the church inside the Prague Castle. It took 600 years to be built and it is pretty amazing. The previous post had a picture of a stainless glass window from inside.

I am having trouble posting lots of pictures to this blog so for now this is all I will post from Prague. I hope this is a little better. I'll also type up some of my impressions of Prague sometime tomorrow afternoon once I unwind after the massive German exam I have tomorrow.

Wish me luck!

Prague Photos

2006-09-25T16:37:00.000+02:00

A few pictures from Prague.

A stained glass window from the inside of a very beautiful church that is within the walls of the biggest castle in the world. It is known as, simply, the Prague Castle. Oh yeah, the castle was built in 870 AD. So it's a little old I guess ;-)

This is some old Soviet style housing. This is just a giant housing complex outside of Prague. I found it really interesting to see in person.

This river divides Prague. It is really beautiful. I took this picture from the really famous Charles Bridge (karluv most in Czech) that was the only bridge spanning this river for a long time. It has a famous history including being the cite of several executions during the Reformation and Counter Reformation period.

I don't know what this building is actually (I'm a bad tourist sometimes) but lots of buildings in Prague look this amazing. Prague is old. And a little overwhelming to be a tourist in, especially only for a day.

This is the Astronomical Clock, one of the most famous landmarks in Prague. I have not a clue how to read it, but it sure is pretty. We sat and stared at this for quite awhile.

I took over 100 pictures in Prague, and this is just a sample. I also hope to review the Pearl Jam concert I attended, maybe even song by song, but first I have to receive the copy of the concert I ordered online so I can listen through it again and remember how amazing it was.

Maybe later I'll post up another set of pictures from Prague because the more I look at this, the more I realize how little of the feel of the city it captures. So look forward to a few more pictures in the future.

Prag

2006-09-24T16:32:00.000+02:00

24.09.06

Prag war super schoen. Es ist ein alte Stadt mit eine 600+ Jahre alt Bruecke. Die Bruecke ist sehr beruehmt Weltweit. Wir sahen der grossten Schloss der Welt. Das war schoen mit einer grossen Kirche (es war Gotik). Die stadt war viel Spass und schoen fuer spazieren gehen. Der Metro war ein bisschen komisch weil die Haltestelle gescholossen fuer 1 Stunde oder mehr mit keine Grund war. Das war ein bisschen anders.

Malte und ich hatten viel Spass. Wir tranken ein paar Biere, assen bein ein Restaurant an ein komische Strasse in Prag, und sah Thai Boxing und das Mittlegewicht-Boxing Meisterschaft fern. Alles war viel Spass, aber Pearl Jam war viel, viel Besser.

Heute gehen wir nach Muenchen zurueck. Das war sehr einfach, nicht gleich unsere Reise nach Prag.

Pearl Jam Konzert

2006-09-23T02:21:00.000+02:00

22.09.06
Heute war super fantastisch. Ich ging nach Pragu und sah ein Konzert. Das war unglaublich. Unsere Fahrt war sehr schwer aber wir waren erfolgrig. Das ist fantastischen!

Erst waren wir in bisschen Spaet zu anfangen nach Prag. Wir verliesse Muenchen um 12.30. Aber wir kamen ein Stau aus der Autobahn nahe Regensburg an. Das war schrecklich. Wir warten fuer 45 Minuten und hatten keine Ahnung wo waren wir. Dann fanden wir die Weg und nach ein paar mehr falsch angeboten, kamen wir an Prag.

Prag war viel Spass. Man kann nicht Links in Prag abgeben, aber. Immer mussen wir links angeben und immer durfen wir das nicht. Es war 17.30 Uhr un wir mussen unsere Konzert Karte um 18.00 Uhr abgeholen. Wir riefen die Konzertkartegeschaeft an und sagten wir wereden Spaet sein. Sie sagten: "Alles ist OK, wir bleiben fuer euch!" Viel Glueck! Um 18.20 kamen wir zu die Konzertkartegeshaeft und unsere Karte abholen.

Dann hatten wir nicht genug Zeit vor dem Konzert zu finden unser Hotel. Wir suchten ein Weg direkt nach die Konzert und mussten unser Auto bei ein Bahnhof parken. Wir gingen mit U-Bahn nach Sazka Arena und alles war OK.

Pearl Jam war super fantastisch. Das Konzert war so laut, und klingt mir sehr, sehr gut. Ich kann die grossartig nicht beschrieben. Es war zu cool. Sie hat viele meine Lieblingslieds gespielt. Sie spielte:
Nothingman; Sad, Betterman; Yellow Ledbetter; Alive; Evenflow und viel mehr. Alles war wunderbar-- "Evenflow" war besonders toll mit eine langen, tollen Gitarrenduel.

Pearl Jam sieht genau wie Rockstars aus. Eddie Vedder traegtet ein Bush Kostume und tanzt und sang. Das war sehr Lustig, und ein bisschen politisches.

Nach das tollen Konzert mussten wir zu der Hotel fahren. Es dauerte sehr lange (50 Minuten) weil wir das Hotel nicht finden konnten.

Jetzt bin ich im Hotel und alles ist fantastisch. Ein super schoene Tag.

Und... Ich machte auch meine Pruefung heute Perfekt. Super!

Intolerance and Student Liberalism

2006-09-21T16:54:00.000+02:00

Warning: The following post is a very inarticulate way to vent my frustrations. I'm feeling a little cynical today, so bear that in mind.

Two things that really frustrate me, which I will probably elaborate on later:

1) When people try to be unique for the sake of being unique. Because, ironically, that is the least unique idea in the world. Moreover, when they act superior to people who choose any semblance of conformity or normalacy--this really angers me. Usually it makes me mad because people do this to assert their dominance over someone who is having a tough enough time as it is. I see this happen to people around me a lot, and it makes me want to rush to their defense, but...

2) The stereotypical student idea of "liberalism". The liberal ideal I think usually becomes completely perverted when reflected off of student liberal groups because they are often too radical, too impractical, and not very credible to most people. They embrace alternatives not for the merits of the alternative, but because of the chic associated with rejecting the mainstream. It is perfectly okay to hold these beliefs--and radicalism has its place to push change in the mainstream, I understand that good and well--but it frustrates me so much because it is so much energy that I think could be harnessed into something much more effective (which student groups have managed to do in the past).

What makes me most frustrated about this is that while liberals often demand that people tolerate their beliefs, their speech, and their opinions--they often are intolerant themselves to opinions other than their own. This frustrates me a lot, because I think it chills a lot of good debate and dialogue in the classroom.

The funny thing is, if I had to classify myself, I think I have more liberal sympathies than conservative sympathies, but I loathe being stereotyped as a "student liberal" because of the reasons I have just outlined and more.

I think most of these feelings can be directly attributed to my tendency to do two things: 1) criticize whatever system I am in, usually I try to be constructive, in order to look at ways to improve it (or just vent my frustrations, I'm not always noble) and 2) play the devil's advocate to whatever the dominant ideology is that I am surrounded by. The more liberal of a place I go, the more conservative I find myself thinking, and vice versa when I am in a liberal place (living in both Montana and Oregon proved this theory quite well for me). The funny thing is I don't even know how strongly I actually believe a lot of the arguments I put up when I am playing devil's advocate, but I often feel compelled to defend the minority voice in order to push the discussion further.

And really, deep down, I'm a debater. Argumentation and conflict of ideas is what I crave. I think that's the only way we ever get closer to the truth, because--and I think this is what a lot of students don't want to realize because it isn't sexy--moderation is almost always the best choice. I'm not the first person to say it, and I won't be the last, but I'll be frustrated as long as I am surrounded by people who are so afraid of moderation.

End rant. I am going to Pearl Jam in Prague this weekend, and it will be mindblowing. A full review of the concert will be posted here shortly after!

Regensburg

2006-09-20T20:54:00.000+02:00

20.9.06
Erst, kann ich nach Prag fahren! Ich kann Pearl Jam sehen. Gestern habe ich mein Pass abgehoelt. Das war super fantastisch, aber ich habe mein Geld fuer Stipendium nicht jetzt bekommen.

Heute bin ich in Regensburg. Regensburg ist sehr alt, und sehr schoen. Ich mag alte Staedte und alles hier kommt aus die Mittelalter. Der Stadtmauer war im 076 gebauedet. Die Bruecke war im 1100 gebauedet. Die Kirche war im 1500 (nicht genau, natuerlich) gebauedet, aber sie war im 1100 begann. Das ist alles sehr schoen aber das Stadttour war ein bisschen lang fuer mich. Ich mag alles das Geschichte, aber ich verletzte mich mein Knie und es ist ein bisschen schmerzhaft.

Ich habe auch ein "Benedikt Bier" geakauft. Es war OK, aber nicht heilig.

Ich bin sehr gluecklich. Letztens ist alles in Ordnung. Ich kann nach Prag fahren, ich habe viele Ideen ueber mein Zukunft, und obwohl bin ich ein bisschen einsam, das ist OK. Ich habe viel zu tun und ich wird mit andere Leute spaeter kennenlernen. Jetzt muss ich einziehen, und finde was ich will studieren. Vielleicht Mikrooekonomie weil das mir sehr gefaellt. Wir werden sehen.

Alles in Ordnung

2006-09-19T17:27:00.000+02:00

"Alles ist in Ordnung" or "alles in ordnung" is a very German phrase, and not just because it is--well--in German. Literally translated it means in English "everything is in order" but it is used much more liberally than that. When everything is okay, many Germans will say "alles in ordnung" or when they are finished with something as well. The funniest use of this phrase I have seen is when a German child is crying at the playground sometimes the mother will ask the child why it is crying and say "alles in ordnung" as a comfort to the child.

I find this really funny because I think it speaks to the German sense of order. Children use the phrase from a very young age, and I think that says how much of the German identity is associated with things being in the correct place, on time, and following the right protocols. It is a subtle difference, and probably not incredibly significant in the long run, but it is very interesting.

The good news is that for me, today, "Alles ist in Ordnung". Today I was a beneficiary of the Germans proficiency for bureaucracy because my immigration papers were rushed through processing and I received my Passport. That means I get to go to Prague this weekend, I get to see Pearl Jam, and I get to have a beer with Malte. (And escape all the spiders in my bedroom as well). I am very excited about this, and really, a blog entry just isn't going to do it justice.

Instead I'll tell you a funny story about the Immigration Office in Germany. I was waiting for them to paste my Visa or whatever document they put in my passport and while it was processing they had a waiting station. Maybe big offices in the US have a similar system, but to me this system seemed to have German written all over it. Now, just like many places you wait in line I received a number. However, instead of just waiting in a line with my number and having someone shout "Next" there are screens placed around the room. Each screen has a number for the window that will serve you, and then next to it the number of the person being served. There were five people working behind the windows and they would just process the passports, come up, punch the number up and wait for people to come forward and pick up their passports.

Needless to say, the system was incredibly efficient, when the people with the numbers actually went to pick up their passport. I was about 40 numbers behind when I started waiting and I had to wait about 15 minutes. I thought this was pretty fast, and I always knew the status of the line. It made the whole thing less nerve-wracking, but maybe I was just in a really good mood to finally get my passport back. Anyway, they have this system throughout the whole immigration building, and I found it incredibly fascinating to see it everywhere.

At any rate, the list of things I have to worry about is now becoming very small. As soon as my scholarship money starts kicking in, and I have a known source of income, I will be able to stop focusing on getting "settled in" and start focusing on really exploring/enjoying/studying/and loving Munich.

Almost there.

Gestern Abend

2006-09-17T18:07:00.000+02:00

17.09.06
Gestern war sehr einsam. Ich rief meine Familie und Kelly an, und dann fuehlte ich viel besser. Meine Freunden hier sind nett aber ich kenne sie nicht so gut. Wir brauchen Zeit zusammen, denn wir werden einander gut kennenlernen. Wenn terffe ich neue Leute, muss ich immer sehr lang zu fuehlen gemuetlich warten. Jetzt ist es genau wie Freshman Orientation fuer mich. Das ist OK, ich muss nur warten.

Auch gestern Nacht war in Mann in meinem Haus sehr besoffen und krank. Er war sehr laut bis 2 oder 3 und das war ganz schrecklich. Ich schlief nicht so gut. Hoeffentlich ist heute Nacht sehr viel besser.

What Are You Doing Here?

2006-09-17T13:04:00.000+02:00

I have always felt that I have to be best prepared to face any situation possible in life. This is an obviously endless and futile task because there are an infinite amount of situations in life, and more likely than not you will find yourself unprepared for many, if not most of them. Yet I have always felt since I was in middle school that I needed to prepare myself the best I could to handle as many possibilities as I could.

Just a brief example, because this is unrelated to my post for the most part. When I was younger I always considered taking a job that entailed heavy physical labor. Now, I am by no means a big enough person to handle such a job well, I am quite small and this would have been incredibly difficult for me. The benefit, I thought, would be that I would a) be able to understand better what it is like to work that kind of job, and relate to people who have jobs like that better and b) I would become physically stronger without becoming a gym rat. The second benefit was one I have often thought about because while I have never felt very self-conscious about how my body appeared, I was certainly conscious that in certain situations my strength might not be enough to face the situation. This is an irrational thought for the most part, but I would worry that maybe I wouldn't be able to pull someone from a car after an accident or something similar to this and I would be upset with myself after for not having "prepared".

So now that I sound a little crazy, let's get to what this has to do with Germany.

I guess in the past few days here I have realized I am learning a lot more than German over here, and that I really am preparing myself for a whole wide variety of situations I may face in my future. I am getting a set of life-skills that I may have been slower to develop or not have developed at all.

Cooking--something I would never have attempted, is something I attempt a few times a week and slowly am improving at.

Communication. With people who do not speak my native language, or who don't share any common language with me (as happens in the kitchen in my dorm quite often so far this year).

Living on my own, managing my money... things that were of much less concern at an American college because many of your basic needs are taken care of for you (cafeteria food is looking so nice).

Travelling. In America I always travelled either on a short, direct airline flight, or with my car. A car is a nice, private form of transportation, that coming from Montana, I took for granted as a fact of life, a necessity. Without a car here, I am starting to figure out other ways to travel, mass transit, rail systems, international flying. Being familiar with all of these things is something I don't think I would have experienced until much later in life. (Though travelling is still a big hassle to me, and I still find it difficult and frustrating. I'm getting better about that.)

Tolerance. Not that I was intolerant before, but here I am faced with different customs, different political ideologies and different and sometimes baffling beliefs fairly regularly (even just from the American students I am here with). I can't just isolate myself from these beliefs or ignore them as I think I would be more likely to do back home. Instead I have to accept them as equally valid, or at the very least, not let it frustrate me that people hold beliefs that seem completely contrary to the actual evidence from my point of view. This is a slow, but valuable learning process.

Opening my eyes. This is vague, but I guess being here has made me really consider that a lot of the things we take for granted in the US (people working on Sundays) are not universal truths, and there are different ways to do almost anything. In Germany most places are completely closed on Sunday, and I guess I just realized that is another way of organizing the week that the US has moved away from. There are little observations like this all the time.

Living conditions. Apparently going to a private university has many benefits I took for granted, like dorm rooms in good condition. Today I discovered spiders had laid eggs in my bag of rolls, thus ruining my breakfast (and my appetite for a short time). I am learning to live with a little less luxury here, and that is probably a good thing. It isn't unbearable, but living in a room that is a little less luxurious will make me appreciate everything back home much more I have a feeling.

Okay, that's it for now. All of those thoughts came rushing at me while I was taking a shower in one of the wonderfully run down showers in our dorm. At least I can still think in those showers, even if I can't ever get the water temperature to stay constant for more than two minutes.

These Are A Few of My Favorite Things

2006-09-16T16:02:00.000+02:00

Here are a few pictures from some of the more beautiful buildings in downtown Munich. We had a good little trip to the inner-city the other day, and it was overwhelming to just stand inside these massive, ancient buildings and admire them. It was quite amazing

You almost have to see this thing to believe it. I can't remember which church this is, we saw three in downtown Munich on the same day, but I remember my jaw just dropping when we walked in and saw this. This church is over 500 years old, and it has a little bit of every architectural style to it.

This statue is from a monument erected in commeration of the Swedish king's decision to not destroy Munich during the 30-Year War. It was promised to be a "massive building to honor God" but it actually pales in comparision to the old and new Mayor's Offices. You can see the "new" (less than 200 years old) Mayor's office in the background.

These are the spires of the Frauenkirche. This church is just incredibly tall, and when you go inside it is all of these columns stretching so high. Not to sound nerdy, but it reminded me of the scene in LOTR: Fellowship when they are running through the mines of Moria. That is how tall these columns are.

This is the last church we saw, it is either St. Michael's or Peter's church, but I get them confused. It is really simple, and I love the white/gold combination and the curved ceilings. It is hard to capture how stunning the inside of this building looks with just a picture, when you are standing inside it is something else.

This is a cool shot of the new Mayoral building in downtown Munich. I just love how ornate the outside of the building, and I think I got lucky with this picture because of the contrast with the sky, it looks kind of cool.

Anyway, now you have a taste of downtown Munich. Quite impressive. Quite impressive.

Prag Nicht Mehr?1?

2006-09-16T15:17:00.000+02:00

16.9.06
Gestern war sehr schlecht. Mein Program nahm meine Reisepass von mich. Sie brauchen meine Pass fuer die Einwanderungsbehoerde (sweet German word, it means immigration office). Das Problem ist mein Pass ist fuer zehn Tage verloren. Ich brauche mein Pass in sechs Tage fuer eine Reise nach Prag. Jetzt muss ich das Konsulat besuchen, und frage sie fuer Hilfe. Das ist nicht meine Schuld, weil mein Program sagte nichts ueber wielange wird unsere Pass verloren sind. (bis es war zu Spaet, natuerlich). Ich glaube das ist schlechte Deutsch weil ich ein bisschen aergerlich und schlimm ueber das bin. Hoeffentlich geht es besser naechste Woche. Ich kann nicht fuer Oktober warten. Dann wird alles mehr langsam und ruehig sein. Kein mehr Vorsemester, kein mehr Sorgen mit Geld, nur Unterricht und Spass!

Scheissestag

2006-09-15T16:01:00.000+02:00

The beautiful thing about the German language is the ability to form endless amounts of words by combining smaller words. In English you can combine some words, but if you want to say a tall apartment you split the words up, in German you don't. This leads to some really long words. It also leads to some really fun words, like the title of this post, which can only begin to describe the last 24 hours.

I'll start at the end and work backward, because I'm most upset with what has just happened. Apparently my study abroad organization needs our passports to process our immigration papers at the immigration office. This is no problem, so they asked us to bring them in, take a new passport photo, and they'd take care of the immigration stuff. I was happy about this. They also asked us if we planned on leaving the EU in the next year because then we need something extra in our passport. I said no, because I have no money for leaving the EU and of course I am heading back to the US next year, but that is different they said. So, no problem.

Boy was I wrong. After they take our passport they tell us we get them back in 10 days. 10 business days. In 5 business days I am travelling to the Czech Republic (to Prague) to catch an awesome Pearl Jam concert, or so I thought. The Czech Republic has been in the EU for two years now, so of course I didn't tell them I was travelling there--they didn't ask. I assumed we would get our passport back immediately (processing immigration papers usually takes only a day anyway). I was wrong. So they tell me this and I say "We have a problem." After some very frustrated German by me, and some confused listening by the people in my program they tell me that I have to try to contact the US Embassy in Munich to obtain some temporary travel visa to go to Prague. Cute.

So I am going to class until 4:00pm every day--starting at 9:00AM--and somehow I'm supposed to find time (presumably my lunch hour) to go down to the Embassy and tell them my sob story. This is the part where it gets tricky. I don't need a new passport, so I need (probably) to have my passport to prove I am me, to obtain the travel visa. Sweet. So I tried to contact the embassy and they only receive calls from 9:00AM to 11:00AM everyday, and they only receive visitors from 1:00pm-4:00pm.

Needless to say, I am incredibly frustrated. I have been looking forward to this concert for literally months. I have bought the tickets, I have booked the hotel, and I am ready to go. What makes me more angry is that my program didn't really seem to be that concerned that I am now trapped in Germany for 10 days. But, I guess if there is any silver lining in all of this it is that my German was good enough to sort this mess out so far, and at least when I talk to the Embassy it will be in English.

But seriously... give me a friggin' break.

This comes on top of problems I won't explain in as much detail concerning my student loans, a traffic citation I received a month ago, and not having access to my scholarship money yet because of the slow crawl of the bureaucratic machine. I can't imagine having this all sorted out in the next two weeks, but I kind of need to get it figured out by then.

It is just really hard to go to class and focus on German for six hours or so every day, come home, do homework, and have time and energy left over to tackle all of this crap. I hope this weekend to take care of most of it, but I am not looking forward to it at all. I feel really stretched thin right now, and I know it will pass, but this trip was supposed to be relaxing. Now I feel like I'm falling apart.

Oh yeah, and Oktoberfest starts this weekend. So maybe I'll get to have some fun there if I can keep my mind off of all of this other stuff.

The part that really bugs me is that only one of these things was my fault. I botched the student loan thing, and I take full responsibility for that. I didn't lose the money for my traffic ticket, the city court did. I also didn't misunderstand my program when they took my passport from me, they never told me they were taking it until after it was gone. That one gets under my skin a lot.

I feel a lot better getting that off my chest. On the bright side, homework is the least of my worries. Maybe in a couple weeks.

Ein Paar Fotos

2006-09-13T23:14:00.000+02:00

These are from my trip through Bavaria today.

This is a Bavarian pasture. The countryside actually looks like this--it is so green. It looks really peaceful here. This is right outside the Wieskirche.

This is a view of the valley taken from Neuschwanstein (the big castle in Germany). The castle is right behind me.

This is a view from the inside of a VERY old church (over 500 years old I believe). I think the plain look of it is quite charming. Especially when compared to the over the top ornamentation found in some other churches (however beautiful the ornamentation may be!).

There's that castle--Neuschwanstein. Wikipedia it. Literally in English it translates to "New Swan Stone" It's the basis for the Disney Castle. It serves absolutely no practical purpose because it was built long after gunpowder was invented. It was just a really cool place to stay when you were the king, in a BEAUTIFUL location.

This is another castle by Neuschwanstein, however I think this may actually be a new building built to resemble the castle and the other castle may be behind. I think this looks cool though. The castle is called Hohenschwangau. Literally in English that translates to "High Swan Area" which is, definitely, a very sexy name.

One thing I found completely frustrating was the ban on taking pictures inside the castles and churches. Some of the other people in our group snuck pictures in these places so I will try to get these and put them here. I had to buy many postcards so I was sure I had memories of being inside some of those places, because all the gold inside them continually blew my mind.

Landfahren

2006-09-13T23:10:00.000+02:00

13.09.06
Heute waren wir aus Bavaria. Wir sahen Neuschwanstein, die Wieskirche, Linderhof, ein Romanische Kirche und ein Kloster. Ich fand alles schoen aber ich glaubte die Schloesser alter waren. Ich war ein bisschen enttaeuschend ueber das. Ich mag altes Baueten weil sie mich bewundernd machen. Alle die Baueten haette so viel Gold ueberalles. Es war zu viel, ich glaube, aber ist es sehr toll zu sehen.

Etwas anders gut: Mein Deutsch wird ganz viel besser. Ich beginn auf Deutsch zu denken. Ich finde das ein bisschen schwer, aber es ist auch wirklich gut. Jetzt muss ich nur meine Sorgen mit Geld in die USA ausbessern, dann kann ich gluecklich sein. Ich muss nur warten.

Allein

2006-09-12T23:07:00.000+02:00

12.9.06
Ich vermisse sie, natuerlich. 70 mehr Tage, das ist alles. Iche hoffe das ist einfach zu warten. Schule ist ganz viel besser. Mein Aufsatz war OK und meine Pruefung auch. Meine Lehrerin fand mein Referat gut, auch. Ich glaube es wird nicht so schwer sein. Mein Deutsch wird ganz besser jedes Tag. Meine Musik hilft mir sehr besser Fuehlen. Ich bin aufgeregt fuer die Zukunft. Wir werden was passiert sehen.

Das Unterschied

2006-09-12T18:42:00.000+02:00

Things I find quite strange here in Germany:
1 ) My bathroom has two toilets, each in individual stalls. There is a washroom in front, then you walk back to the toilets. There is a door seperating them. There are people in my house, a few of them, who whenever they use the bathroom, close the outer door. Nevermind the toilet is in a stall, nevermind there is a door after the sink they could also close. They close both doors.

2) My shower room has two showers. Neither has a shower curtain, however if you are in the back shower no one can see you in there without being quite creepy, and in the front shower you don't have to worry too much about someone seeing you as they would have to do a little work to see you as well. Whenever several people on my floor shower they shut the door to the shower room, essentially tying up both showers. This baffles me--especially in light of--

3) Nude beach in a public park. We rode right by it on our bike tour of the city. No warning signs, no controls, no nothing--just a row of naked people laying in the sun. Bizarre.

4) Lack of nutritional information on everyday food items. What am I going to read while I am bored at lunch when there is no nutritional info to speak of on my chocolate milk?

5) Paying a deposit on EVERYTHING. Want to use a grocery cart? Pay a Euro and you get it back when you return the cart. Want to buy a soda? Put 0.15 Euros down. For a beer it's 0.25. Want to use a luggage cart, bring 1 Euro. A 1 Euro coin is invaluable here in Germany if you want to use anything. Luckily you only need one because you get it back at the end, but this was quite disconcerting at first.

6) Leiderhosen and Drindl. Some people here in Bavaria where this everyday. Not a lot of people, but enough for you to notice. It still makes me chuckle--good for them. I could never pull that off.

7) The helpfulness of people. Can't figure out how to buy a bus ticket? Just grab any random stranger, speak in broken German to them and they will not only explain to you how to buy the ticket, but also walk you through the entire process. I think this might be more of a Munich thing, but I have been pleasantly surprised with this so far and wondered whether I would be so willing to help back in the USA.

8) The smallness of everything. Dishwashers, beds, washing machines, dryers, cars (obviously) are all smaller. But on the flip side you can get bigger beers, bigger loaves of bread, and bigger hot dogs--so maybe it all evens out.

These are just a few quickfire observations from a few weeks of very shallow observation. We'll see how my impressions change once I get assimilated and start feeling really comfortable here. I have a feeling the list will be completely different by then.

Sky

2006-09-10T17:24:00.000+02:00

The sky here is small.

Two nights ago I was out on the grass between some of the "Haueser" here and I looked up at the night sky. To my delight there were stars. My excitement was short lived when I realized just how few stars were actually visible. The lack of visible stars was not, however, due to light pollution--which while decreasing the number of stars did not seem to have as big of an effect as I imagined. No, the lack of visible stars was due to the tiny field of vision presented to me. I felt as if I was looking up through a tunnel, a million miles away from the sky. The tall apartment buildings and trees on every side of me made me feel very small, and confined to the Earth. It made the stars feel distant.

Contrast that with home and you get a good sense of the little things you find yourself missing when you leave somewhere. Surely in Oregon I didn't have a good view of the stars either, but in Oregon I found myself with less time for the stars, and less need. At my house, even with trees around, the sky feels huge. I remember laying on my back in the yard staring up at the stars and clearly seeing the Milky Way, clearly seeing so many stars, and feeling I was in those stars. They surrounded me, engulfed me. It is something I took for granted while I was in Montana. In my whole life I took for granted that the stars would always be there, there was nothing that remarkable.

I guess it is funny to me how going thousands of miles away can give you such a fresh perspective on aspects of your home you thought you had long since completely understood. The more I think about Montana, and how I wanted only to leave it when I was younger, the more I find myself missing this or that idiosyncracy. I am without a doubt romanticizing it in my memory right now, but there is a definite realization there as well. A realization that perhaps Montana is more a part of me than I ever like to give it credit. A realization that perhaps I fit better in Montana than I had ever wanted to let myself believe. A realization that maybe I could be happy there if I just gave it a shot.

At least I would get to see those beautiful stars every night.

Einsam

2006-09-10T12:25:00.000+02:00

10.9.06
Es ist schwer hier. Ich fuehle dumm wann ich Deutsch sprechen muss. Ich kann nicht mich aeussern. Ich habe zu wenigen Woerter in meinem Wortschatz. Das ist kein Problem fuer mich auf Englisch. Ich habe immer etwas sagen. Ich glaube in ein paar Woche es wird sich verbessern. Dann werde ich nicht so einsam fuehlen. Jetzt muss ich den Akzent auf meinen Hausaufgaben setzen. Dann kann ich gut Deutsch sprechen, lesen, und schreiben. Dann kann ich fuer ihr Besuch planen. Das wird Spass sein.

German Literature

2006-09-09T16:29:00.000+02:00

Yes, I will write this post in English.

The only significant work of German literature I have read--aside from several fairy tales--is the wonderful little novel "Am kuerzeren Ende der Sonnenallee" a novel about life in East Germany during the 70s. (Coincidentally, and unrelated, my good German friend lives in Berlin just a few blocks from Sonnenalle, however he lives on the long end, not the short end that was in the East).

The reason I like this books is not because it was particularly well written, my German is too poor for me to be able to judge that, but rather because of the main charachter Micha. Micha is a character I relate to entirely too well, and generally for one reason: Micha, at age seventeen, is hopelessly in love. Micha loves Miriam, a girl who he believes to be way out of his class. Having once been seventeen, and deeply in love, I understand where Micha is coming from.

Throughout the book Micha makes mistake after mistake with Miriam. He comes up with scheme after scheme to win her love, but never tries to just tell her how he feels. Fate seems to keep them apart when Micha is arrested on his way to see Miriam and she believes that he had stood her up instead (he was arrested by a police officer with a grudge against him for no good reason, lest you begin to think poorly of Micha). Micha's love for Miriam is pure, unlike many of the other boys in his school, and it is quite clear Micha doesn't understand it completely. He finds himself doing ridiculous things he would never do before to impress Miriam (becoming the best dancer in his grade by practicing diligently for example).

It is the end of the book that I find so wonderful, and perhaps this is more because it fits more with my own personal life than with anything else. At the end Miriam falls sick because she gets too stressed out about living in the East. She becomes depressed and ill and Micha is desperately searching for a way to make her feel better. He can't stay by her side all the time, but then he tells her he will let her read his diary (Tagebuch) so that she can be with him, while he is away from her side. Miriam doesn't seem too thrilled about the idea, it doesn't seem to make her better, but Micha proceeds anyway.

Micha has one small problem at this point--he has never had a diary. So that night Micha sits down and writes several notebooks full of diary entries to read to Miriam the next day. Say what you will about Micha's deception of Miriam, he did it with only the best intentions. And the image of him writing in a dimly lit room all night pages and pages about Miriam and how he was feeling at this moment or that is quite romantic. It speaks volumes for how Micha feels, and I believe he probably didn't even understand why he told Miriam about the diaries. He wanted so much to make her feel better that he was just searching for something, and when he found that something he was willing to work as hard as he could to make it into a reality.

Of course it works, and Micha and Miriam finally kiss. Miriam feels better, and finally sees that although Micha is one goofy looking guy (at least in the film version) he has a big heart, and he loves her. Now I'm not a big fan of Miriam's character, and I am not sure she deserves a guy as sweet as Micha based on how she acts throughout the book--but when looking at it through rose-colored glasses it is a very sweet story of adolescent love.

Someday I hope to write similar thoughts in German as easily as I have just written this in English.

Das Vorige Tagebuch

2006-09-09T16:13:00.000+02:00

9.9.06

Mein letzte Tagebuch war ihretwegen. Das Tagebuch der Kelly. Mein ganze Herz floss in diesem Tagebuch. Natuerlich las sie das Tagebuch. Ich hoffe sie wird diese Tagebuch auch lesen. Wir sprechen sehr viel oft jetzt, und jetzt bin ich ganz gluecklich. Ich liebe mein Leben. Ich hoffe wir koennen zusammen bleiben. Ich glaube wir wereden. Wann sprechen wir fast taeglich, fuehle ich nahe sie. Ich brauche das Gefuehl. Vielen Dank, Skype.

Tagebuecher!

2006-09-08T15:47:00.000+02:00

"Du bist nich allein. Ich kann sie dir ja morgen vorlesen, meine Tagebuecher." ~ Am kuerzeren Ende der Sonnenallee

I have to write a journal for German class, in German. This is good practice for my German forcing me to write and use new vocabulary. I will post the entries here, and those of you who can read German can an enjoy a deeper look into my personal life. Those of you who can't will have to either translate, or just stare at the pretty words--as someone once told me they would do.

The above quote captures what I think is the beauty of keeping a journal--the ability to give someone else a window into your mind. I think that is a powerful gift, and hopefully this online journal can help people who miss me (they do exist) feel closer to me by sharing in my day to day experiences.

Without further ado, here is entry one (if you are fluent in German I apologize for the slaughter I am bringing to your beautiful language, I hope it gets better):

8.9.2006
Gestern war schlecht. Ich dachte: "Es ist zu schwer hier. Ich muss aussteigen." Aber bin ich heute hoffungsvoll. Meine Liebe wird mich besuchen. Das ist ganz toll, weil ich sie so viel vermisse. Ich denke ueber unsere Liebe so oft. Montana war so viel Besser mit sie. Ich will nur sie bei mir. Ich weiss, dass ich fuer sie muss warten. Ich weiss, aber ich finde es ganz schwer. Alles ist OK jetzt weil sie im elf Wochen hier wird sein. Ich kann warten.

My Personal Goals

2006-09-05T20:46:00.000+02:00

What am I doing here in Munich?

To catch everyone up I will just briefly outline the purpose of my study in Europe. Plus it might be good to remind myself once in awhile exactly what I am doing here.

1) Learn German.
Fluency in a foreign language is a great intellectual hurdle I would really like to jump. German was chosen because of my distaste for Spanish in high school and my close friendship with a German exchange student to my high school my senior year.

2) Study Politics
Ludwig-Maximillians Universitaet (here on called the LMU) is one of the better universities for politics in Germany. In fact, several nationally (German nationally, not American... I don't think) famous political scientists are professors at the LMU. Moreover there are a myriad of internship opportunities open for me as an American citizen with (hopefully) German language skills. These are connections I would be unable to make in the USA due to geographic constraints (most think tanks in the US are on the East Coast and in California... far from me).

3) Experience Europe.
This is something I can do anytime I have the money, but since I am here now I want to see Europe and experience European culture. The European lifestyle, mindest, etc. is different from that of an American. This difference fascinates me and I hope to look at it closely. I hope to do this with the people I love most when the come to visit me periodically over the next ten months.

4) Challenge Myself.
I need to push myself as hard as I can socially, intellectually, emotionally, and challenge my own maturity and my ability to live on my own. There is no better place to do that because everything here is just a little bit harder because of the language and cultural differences (no 24 hour grocery stores? what?!?). I hope to overcome all of these hurdles and find life back in the USA more comfortable, and easier than life was here--at least life is here at first. After living here for a year I will always feel more mobile and free knowing I have the ability to live in a foreign country and (hopefully) thrive.

5) Gain Perspective.
I hope to be able to take a more objective look at my home country, world politics, and my culture in order to see how it looks from the outside. This is probably the most important and invaluable benefit I can gain from this time abroad. It is like being able to look at my culture not through a mirror, but as a completely seperate entity. This should help me when studying politics in the future for a long time, and it should allow me to be more understanding and sensitive to other cultures (not that I was a bigot before, but it can't hurt right?).

I'm sure more goals will come up as the year goes on. I'll be sure to keep them posted here.

Mein Zimmer

2006-09-05T20:42:00.000+02:00

This is me in my room. How cute! This is on the first day of classes.